tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-51868095769620834742024-03-05T07:28:49.155-08:00 Choosing life.Aisling Gallagherhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03368535232741519189noreply@blogger.comBlogger42125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5186809576962083474.post-83718714300547961092016-05-23T05:58:00.001-07:002016-05-23T05:59:45.521-07:00Not all men harass women, but all women have been harassed by men. <div class="p1">
<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">CN discussions of sexual violence, including rape, sexual harassment & assault</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I really, really love dancing. I am incredibly self-conscious and need a good few drinks before I’ll do it, but when I do, I love it. Especially to music from my childhood or adolescence, in a sticky club with my best friends, dancing until my knees are killing me. I have so many good memories of last minute Friday nights out while I was at university, with good music and dancing for hours. It was one of the only ways I was able to relax or reward myself during my final year, where the stress of finals and degree classifications and my ongoing health problems felt like they could kill me.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I don’t go out dancing very much any more. I realised today that the last time I’d properly gone out has been months ago, at least. I don’t remember when it was. There’s a number of reasons for this — London is extortionately expensive, getting home is a pain, I’m skint and tired and can’t travel very much. But the main reason I don’t really go out dancing any more is because of men.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">If you ask any woman or person who is read as a woman in their 20s, they will tell you about the times they were told as a teenager that sexual harassment was a normal part of an evening out, especially a night in a club. Expect to be groped, felt up, kissed, touched without your consent. It just happens. It happens to all of us. Why are you making a big deal? You were really drunk, anyway. Get used to it.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Everyone is told this, because every person has had the experience of a man touching them in some way without their consent on a night out with their friends. Not all men harass women, but every woman has been harassed by a man.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">A few nights ago I was out in a city I don’t live in with a relatively big group of people, all of whom would be read as women. As we’d arrived early in the night, we’d managed to secure an area for ourselves where we could sit down and had our own space to dance, alone, without the usual club crowds. It was going wonderfully. </span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">And then a middle aged man came over to us and said, “alright, ladies?” or something to that effect. I asked him to <i>please leave us alone</i>, that we didn’t want to talk to him. At this, he became affronted. He insisted on staying with us, because it was a free country and he had the right to stand where he wanted, apparently. It didn’t matter that I had pleaded with him to please, please just let us be. It didn’t matter because he didn’t care. He didn’t care because he was so angry that a woman he did not know did not accept his perceived entitlement to a conversation with us, to sharing a physical space with us. We told him no, and he did not accept our unacceptance of his advance. He stood leaning at the bar, looking my friends up and down as they danced, who were unaware of his glances; his eyes lingering on the curve of their calves, the dress tied at their waist, the plunge of their neckline. It made me feel sick and I wanted to cry. </span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">At this point, I ended up asking a staff member who had been going to and fro from the area we were in to the bar with empty glasses, to ask him to leave. The staff member got security, which is not something I would’ve chosen to do given my own bad experiences with security staff members in clubs. They’re the ones who didn’t believe me when I was in tears telling them I’d just been groped or assaulted by a man, and they’re the ones who then threw me out of their club because I was drunk and crying and I was the one to blame. Oddly, the security staff were good. I could count on one hand the number of times this has happened. But I know they were only good because I wasn’t drunk, I wasn’t crying, I wasn’t slurring my words, I was sober and alert and articulate and purposefully did not let the less sober members of our group talk to them, because I knew they wouldn’t take us seriously. Which is bullshit. I played their game, because without doing so, we would’ve been thrown out. </span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">It was exhausting. I hadn’t been in a club for months. And this was why. Of all the things to happen on a night out, spending too much money, talking to groups of women you don’t know in the bathroom and being harassed or assaulted by a man are almost all of the guaranteed ingredients, no matter where you are. </span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">In my first year of university, like many others, I went out a lot. And so I was sexually harassed or assaulted at least once a week, often more. I became so angry, all of the time. I had so much rage inside of me, because men thought they could touch me when I didn’t want them to, and no one thought anything of it. I started hitting back, literally and figuratively. I remember an incident in a club in Belfast, where a man I didn’t know pinned me against a wall and kissed me furiously, one hand on my cheek and one grabbing my waist. I struggled to get free, and when I did, I punched him. And then I was promptly thrown out. At one point, I was boycotting a well known club and bar because they threw me out after I reported that I’d been felt up — they told me I was on drugs and I was causing problems. I remember months later my best friend texting me drunkenly, telling me she was sorry that she was going to the bar because the work party she was out with wanted to, and she felt so guilty about it. She was the only friend to even acknowledge and legitimise the pain and anger i felt towards the club and its staff. Everyone else ignored it as another thing that crazy Aisling was doing because she’s a crazy feminist. </span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I harboured so much rage and anger in my body that year, and together with a cocktail of then-undiagnosed mental health problems, it ruined my time in university. When I am back in Belfast, my main memories stem around where and when I was assaulted, at which time, and what I was wearing. I know I am not alone in this, because this happens to most women at some point during their life. Learning this, learning about the politics of structural oppression and patriarchy and feminism helped — I had a framework in which to place my experiences and the thoughts I had. It wasn’t my fault. It wasn’t any of our faults, even though we all felt like it was. </span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">What I didn’t realise or expect was the long-lasting effect these years have had on me. Granted, I’m still young. I’m only 23. But a lot has happened, a lot has changed and I have grown hugely since the age of 19. My life is very different now, and I feel older than my years. What I didn’t expect were the flashbacks and dreams that periodically dominate my life these days. I didn’t expect that I would stop wearing certain things, especially heels. I didn’t expect that I’d drastically change my hairstyle, partially in an effort to look less conventionally attractive to men. I didn’t expect that a few words from a middle-aged man in a nightclub in Edinburgh would send me over the edge, anxious, awake and crying till 4.30am, reliving the past experiences I’d had and ending up taking a valium in an attempt to quiet the images and the taunts swirling around my head. I didn’t expect to ever identify with the term ‘survivor’. But here I am. </span></span></div>
Aisling Gallagherhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03368535232741519189noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5186809576962083474.post-30865938358214959262016-05-07T17:29:00.000-07:002016-05-07T17:29:45.408-07:00Death is not noble. <span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Content warning for discussions of death, frank discussions of suicide including methods, mental illness.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Death is not noble. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">In so many pieces of writing on mental illness, the diagnosis, the experience, the horror of it all - it's all romanticised as hell. And that's bullshit. Dangerous, dangerous bullshit.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I remember reading these kinds of posts when I was a clinically depressed teenager who kept being told that I was an attention seeking little shit. Because I was attention seeking, because I felt like I was dying. I felt like my mind was killing me from the inside. And so I looked at how to make that inside-dying seem like it was worth something, like it meant something, like it could mean something other than the ending of a life prematurely. I tried to make myself feel better because I could have followed a line of tortured genius artists who lived and died by depression. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">But it didn't. And I am still here, several dangerous suicide attempts later, I am here. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">And in the twelve or so years I have suffered and lived with mental health conditions, the one thing I have learnt most of all is that there is no glory in death. There is nothing cool about being so unwell you want to hurt yourself. There is nothing edgy about drinking yourself to oblivion because you don't know how else to get yourself to sleep. There is nothing epic or romantic or amazing or incredible or noble about death, and there never will be.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I don't know what I believe about what happens when we die. I know that I think about those I've known who have have died a lot, but I don't know what that means. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I know a lot of young people who have died by suicide. I do not use their lives and their deaths as a bullshit positive means to 'keep myself going', because that implies that there was something good about their deaths. And there wasn't. There is nothing good about parents being left and siblings being left and a life being ended fifty years before it should have been. Every death was in some way preventable and every death was a life on earth ended far too short. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Death is not noble and neither is depression. Those of us who suffer with chronic depression and suicidal ideation and tendencies will tell you that at the worst moments, there is nothing we would not do to rid ourselves of what we feel. I would trade my pain for anyone else's, because depression makes you a selfish little shit. And if you're reading this and you've never experienced depression, I am glad. I am glad because it is the worst thing I have so far gone through in my (admittedly short) twenty-three years, and unfortunately for many of us it is chronic. People do not see when you haven't showered in ten days, when getting changed makes you cry, when doors and phones and bills go unanswered, and when you're such a horrible irritable little dick that people can barely stand to be around you. Because depression isn't cool and it isn't romantic because it is fucking shit. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Death is not noble and me dying at the age of 13 would have done absolutely fuck all. It would have broken my parents, my wonderful caring parents, and it would have destroyed my three sisters. It would have scarred my best friends and it would have (metaphorically) killed my grandparents. I was a scared, ill, lonely child, who thought suicide was the only way to end the pain. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Whether or not there is an after life with a higher religious power isn't important. We can all believe and have faith in whatever we want to believe and have faith in. What matters is that death is not romantic and it is not cool and it is not noble. There is nothing romantic about being found covered in your own vomit, or a train driver having to live with the fact that they hit someone. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Death is so often the premature ending of a life that should have gotten grounded at some point for staying out too late, that should have gained their college qualifications, that should have grown as an adult and developed political beliefs and went on demos and yelled at Tories and had their faith in the world broken and torn down and rebuilt by the people around them. That should have fallen in love, which is the best and worst thing a person can have happen to them. That should have gone in and out of periods of being a dick, because we all do. And that then should have wised up.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">I am currently going through a rough patch. I have tried to kid myself that if I died, I would be doing it for a higher cause. Right now, that the DWP would have another person to add to their list of people they've denied benefits to who have then committed suicide. That the mental health services in my area are stretched to breaking point and the lack of care results in patient suicide. That trying to live a life in London on barely any money eats away at your head, and your heart, until it's too much to live with and you can't do it anymore. But none of that would have mattered. Because even if all of those things were true, my poor sister would still have to identify my body, and my parents would have to arrange for it to be flown home. People would have to organise a funeral. My room in London would have to be packed up, my bank account closed, the posters on my wall taken down. And none of that is romantic. None of it is cool. None of it is heroic. And no matter how much incredible poetry or music I could have written, or lives I could have touched - it wouldn't have made it any less terrible. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">I came across this PostSecret postcard years ago, when I was a depressed teenager. And unsurprisingly, it always stuck with me. I don't know what the answer is to chronic suicidal ideation. I don't know why some of us suffer with this. But we do, and the least we can do is make sure that we keep talking the romance out of it. There is no romance in suicide and there is no beauty in death. </span><br />
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<br />Aisling Gallagherhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03368535232741519189noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5186809576962083474.post-81790152584154718642016-03-13T06:43:00.000-07:002016-03-13T06:45:14.291-07:00Being worn down by sexism. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I am worn down by sexism. I am worn down by the word sexism. I am worn down by the thought of sexism. I am worn down and try not to think about it, because I find it so draining.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Last week I attended an event run by the <a href="http://www.gold.ac.uk/centre-for-feminist-research/" target="_blank">Centre for Feminist Research</a> in Goldsmiths. The centre is run by my tutor, <a href="http://feministkilljoys.com/" target="_blank">Sara Ahmed</a>, and runs events in Goldsmiths throughout the year. This event was on sexism, and the speakers all focused on sexism in higher education.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">The first speaker talked about a 'bloody document' she has carried with her for 30 years. As a young graduate student, she wrote an essay and her professor covered it in red ink, 'correcting' her 'mistakes'. When I saw each slide, my jaw dropped. I imagine jaws dropped across the room. She is now a professor and head of a department at one of the most prestigious universities in the world. Her old professor is still teaching. She has kept this essay for 30 years. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><a href="https://www.lwbooks.co.uk/sites/default/files/nf86_02franklin.pdf" target="_blank">Here</a> is the paper she wrote.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I thought,</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">This feels strange, but I can't think of a time where I faced institutional sexism while at this university.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I thought,</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I've never had a lecturer or professor treat me the way this speaker was treated.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I thought,</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Maybe it's because in Goldsmiths, I've only been taught by women. And mostly black women. My course classes are very different to what they used to be. There's occasionally one or two men in the classroom. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I thought,</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Queen's wasn't like that. In Queen's I was often the only woman in my class. I was taught almost entirely by white men. I was surrounded by men. I became a feminist killjoy. I was angry, all of the time.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">But I still can't think of a time where my tutors or professors sexually harassed me. That feels strange.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">But then I thought,</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Hang on. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I have spent a lot of time arguing with Goldsmiths as an institution about being disabled. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I thought,</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I spend a not inconsiderable amount of my time explaining to other students how to navigate disability bureaucracy. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I thought,</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I sat with my friend and the staff member who approves assignment deferrals, as she sat in tears, shaking with anxiety, and he visibly did not care. He did not offer a tissue. There was no empathy in his voice. My friend and I left the meeting and she cried for a while. She was shaking with the ferocity of her sobs. I was furious. I wanted to complain. I was so angry at how she had been treated by a staff member who was responsible for supporting disabled and unwell students. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I have sat opposite men members of staff who have rolled their eyes at the hysterical angry woman in front of them.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I have sat in the disability room in the library while a male staff member stood over me, making me explain why I was in the room. Why I was allowed to be in the room. In front of a room full of students I didn't know. Afterwards, the shame burned my face and I felt like a child. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I thought,</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">This is sexism repackaged and combined with disablism, entwined with racial and class dynamics in the case of my friend's experience. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">After the event, there was a wine reception and I talked with a few of my classmates. I talked about how lucky I felt to have had such incredible teachers during my time here. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">A classmate has taken an elective module with another department, and has had a tough time. She is taught by a man who, within the first two classes, she knew she couldn't stand. She knew it was going to be difficult to get through this term, being taught by him. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">We talked about the way that sexism has worn us down to the point where we think we do not encounter it. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">When we encounter sexism in class, from male classmates, we are exhausted before we put up our hand to tell a man why what he has just done was incredibly sexist. We feel the weight of the response our response will get. And we decide in that moment whether or not we have the energy to respond to the response our responding to sexism will receive. And more often than not, we decide the effort is too great, and we don't put our hand up. </span><br />
<br />Aisling Gallagherhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03368535232741519189noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5186809576962083474.post-80119645841938861422016-02-08T09:21:00.000-08:002016-02-08T09:21:23.515-08:00Changing Minds Fest <span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">At the weekend the Southbank Centre in London held the <a href="http://www.southbankcentre.co.uk/whatson/festivals-series/changing-minds" target="_blank">#ChangingMindsFest</a>, a weekend long festival dedicated to mental health. I had seen it advertised and thought about going, but that was before I started to become more ill in December and stopped really organising things to do.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">As part of <a href="https://dayinthelifemh.org.uk/" target="_blank">A Day In The Life</a>, they invited contributions answering the questions:</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">"How was your day, what made your mental health better and what made it worse?"</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I decided to submit the speech I made at the TUC Mental Health & Austerity event that day, and just found out that it was included. The slideshow played for 36 hours on a loop at the Southbank. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><a href="https://docs.google.com/presentation/d/1OtLUzcpFWkXrSQlmm24-olmZxn-NBFU0y0JWPBdGgyA/pub?start=true&loop=true&delayms=15000&slide=id.p" target="_blank">My answer are slides 11 - 24</a>, with a content note for suicide.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>Aisling Gallagherhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03368535232741519189noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5186809576962083474.post-47117787656197994412016-02-03T08:41:00.000-08:002016-02-03T09:32:15.239-08:00Calling in and calling out.<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">This post is inspired by conversations I've been having recently with people, mostly offline, on how we feel people should respond to criticism, critique, and call outs, particularly in relation to privilege. It's a conversation I've been having so often I thought I should properly write about it.</span><br>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">When I first got involved in liberation activism, I had no idea what privilege was. I didn't have a very good understanding of the structural inequalities that exist in the world, even though I thought I did. I had experienced sexism, misogyny, ableism, queerphobia - but probably wouldn't have been able to name those experiences as being part of a wider structural issue. I looked at those experiences as a series of one offs.</span><br>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">The first time I was called out - for using stigmatising language in relation to mental health - I was appalled. I was disgusted. I was beside myself that <i>I</i>, someone with mental health problems, could ever possibly misuse words that can be seen as derogatory. The person who called me out did it - in a way I would now say - incredibly politely. They sent me a short email, off the email list, explaining that the language I used was problematic for A, B & C reasons, and were perfectly pleasant. And I still felt like I'd been wronged the biggest wrong to ever happen in the existence of the world.</span><br>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Fast forward five years. I have wised up. I have changed a lot, my politics have developed, and I've grown up. I'm not 18 years old anymore. I still slip up, I am still called out on things, and I am still trying to grow and develop my politics around liberation in particular and I know I will continue to slip up and will need to keep reflecting on my behaviour and actions as I get older. And the way I look at call ins and call outs is radically different.</span><br>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">It is quite a human reaction to be upset or anxious or panicked (especially if you suffer with mental health problems around anxiety) when someone calls you out, no matter how respectfully or politely they do it (and they're under no obligation to be polite or respectful about it). You worry about who you've upset, and how you've upset them, and what the affect of whatever you've done/said has been. </span><br>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">But, if you too believe that being called up on your privilege is a very useful and helpful process during which you are able to learn about an aspect of something you overlooked, or hadn't considered, then you must continually remind yourself that you <i>want</i> to be called out. You want to be a <i>better ally</i> to marginalised groups you do not define into. And that means listening whenever someone calls you up on your shit, and acknowledging that in all likelihood they are coming from a place or experience that you may not know as much about.</span><br>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">No matter how emotional your reaction, or how poor your mental health, the person who is giving you their time and labour to call you out should <i>not</i> have to calm you down, or console you, or reassure you that they understand you didn't mean to do whatever you did. </span><br>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">They have <i>no obligation</i> to be polite when calling you out. In all likelihood they have a reason to be angry, and that reason is legitimate. They should not have to bear the responsibility of dealing with your emotional reaction. It's not up to them. T<i>hey're doing you a massive favour by calling you out</i> - recognise this. Recognise that you are incredibly lucky to have someone take time out of their day to tell you that you fucked up. You are not the injured party here, even if your initial reaction is to be upset.</span><br>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">It is important to develop coping mechanisms for immediate emotional reactions to call outs. When my anxiety is particularly bad, a message from someone telling me I've done something shit and oppressive can make me have a panic attack. And I have begun to accumulate skills to deal with this, including (but not limited to) breathing exercises, reminding myself that this is something I value and appreciate immensely when people take the time out to do it, reminding myself of how I wish people would respond when I call someone out on something, and as someone who can slip into black and white thinking and catastrophising quite easily, reminding myself that the world is not over because I fucked up.</span><br>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">To take an example - I am middle class. I have a financial safety net, I have parents I can borrow money from if I needed to. I did not grow up being shamed for getting free school meals, my parents were able to afford to buy my school uniform brand new, we went on family holidays, we always had food in the fridge. I am skint, but I am not poor. I am not working class. </span><br>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">And so when someone who comes from a working class background decides to take time out of their day to tell me that I fucked up</span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> - I said something shitty (e.g. 'Omg, I'm so poor, this is so shit, you all have no idea how poor I am right now'); </span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I didn't consider an aspect of something (e.g. 'We should totally all go to this event/club/bar/dinner/restaurant! Are you coming? Why aren't you coming?', forgetting that not everyone has disposable income and can afford to spend a fiver on a pint); or I behaved in an oppressive way - I need to sit down and listen. I need to consider my behaviour, and reflect on what I did. I need to appreciate that this person was willing to call me out on my behaviour, and recognise the fact that they may have an incredibly different life experience on this issue than I do, because I come from a privileged position. </span><br>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I see 'calling in' as something that people with privilege should do to other people with privilege - it's my job as someone who is white to educate other white people about racism and the impact and effect of white supremacy. I should 'call in' the fact that they may have done or said something racist. I am responsible for educating other white people to look <i>inwards</i> at our experiences of whiteness, how our whiteness is reflected everywhere in society, how we benefit from a system built on white supremacy and racism. I am also responsible for constantly reflecting on my own white privilege, looking inwards at my <i>own</i> experiences and questioning why they are the way they are.</span><br>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I see 'calling out' as something that marginalised people have a right to do to people with privilege. As previously mentioned, I believe marginalised people are under no obligation to be polite with their call outs - if you're calling someone out on their oppressive behaviour it can be a very upsetting, frustrating and angering thing that they have done, and you are under no obligation to be kind about it. </span><br>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br></span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Here is a post about <a href="http://everydayfeminism.com/2014/01/30-ways-to-be-a-better-ally-in-2014/" target="_blank">being a better ally</a> in general, here is one about <a href="http://mashable.com/2016/01/10/ally-to-people-of-color/#yYTUIiuE4Pqk" target="_blank">being a better ally to people of colour</a> and here is one about <a href="http://mashable.com/2015/07/26/disability-ally-inclusive/#T0ylAx1X48qr" target="_blank">being a better ally to disabled people</a>. If anyone has any articles about being an ally they would recommend, please let me know and I'll include them in here.</span><br>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br></span>Aisling Gallagherhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03368535232741519189noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5186809576962083474.post-3037214557551538302016-01-20T13:46:00.000-08:002016-01-20T13:48:47.941-08:00On welfare reform, and those who matter.<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Content note for suicide</span></div>
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These last few months have seen some good campaigning, particularly from all sectors around the proposed <a href="http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-34915218" target="_blank">tax credit cuts</a>. Whilst they weren't reversed in their entirety, I do believe that the work from trade unions, Labour, and other charities and campaigning organisations definitely helped this.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">But take ESA cuts.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">What is ESA? It stands for Employment & Support Allowance, and is the disability benefit for those of us who are too unwell to work due to disabilities and long-term health problems. When you apply for ESA - an incredibly stressful, over-complicated and difficult process, you usually are called for a Work Capability Assessment. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Initially brought in under Labour, the coalition government outsourced the WCA to ATOS, a French IT company. <a href="https://blogs.citizensadvice.org.uk/blog/maximus-replaces-atos/" target="_blank">ATOS were so bad at their job</a> - to assess ESA claimants to find out if they were fit for work or not - that appeals skyrocketed, costing the government (aka the taxpayer) a shit tonne of money in processing appeals and eventually backdating lots of claims. There were many headlines detailing <a href="http://www.theguardian.com/society/2015/aug/27/thousands-died-after-fit-for-work-assessment-dwp-figures" target="_blank">tragedy after tragedy</a> of people who had died by suicide, usually after being found fit for work and being overcome by despair at their (sometimes inevitable) homelessness and poverty. Some claimants aren't put through a WCA, but this is rare.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Once you have your WCA, you're assigned a group - the work-related activity group, or the support group. The idea behind it is that those who are in the work group may have limited capability to work, but will be able to do some form of 'work-related activity'. The support group is for people who are less likely to be able to return to work in the near future. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">A few months ago, the Tories announced they were cutting the benefit for people in the WRAG group by around £30, to bring it in line with current rates of Job Seekers' Allowance. In April 2017 the rate for those in the WRAG will go <a href="http://www.theguardian.com/politics/2015/oct/27/charities-urge-ministers-to-drop-planned-cuts-to-work-support-allowance" target="_blank">from £102 to £73 a week</a>. This will reduce the yearly income of a person in the work group from £5,000 to just £3,500. The government's reasoning is that the money given to someone in the WRAG isn't a good enough incentive to get back to work. Of course it has nothing to do with an overstretched NHS, local authorities being <a href="http://www.theguardian.com/society/2015/nov/25/local-government-councils-funding-gap-critical-budget-cuts-social-care-spending-review" target="_blank">stripped of their funding</a>, and mental health services <a href="http://www.communitycare.co.uk/2015/06/04/rise-mental-health-bed-occupancy/" target="_blank">under resourced</a> about to <a href="http://www.hsj.co.uk/news/fewer-mental-health-patients-seen-in-community-despite-rising-demand/5091429.article?blocktitle=Mental-health-news&contentID=554#.VjySAs4nwr4" target="_blank">collapse</a>. Of course those things have nothing to do with why a disabled person may not be able to cope with employment.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">If this wasn't bad enough, more shit has been announced in relation to Personal Independence Payments, which were brought in under the coalition government to gradually replace Disability Living Allowance. For more information on what that's been like, read <a href="https://yetanotherlefty.wordpress.com/2013/11/12/how-ive-been-what-applying-for-benefits-is-like/" target="_blank">this</a> (by Liam, on what applying for benefits is really like), <a href="https://yetanotherlefty.wordpress.com/2015/04/24/whereve-i-been-getting-atos-ed-thats-where/" target="_blank">this</a> (by Liam, what it's like dealing with ATOS) and <a href="http://starsandspirals.co.uk/mental-health-poverty-and-the-erosion-of-the-social-safety-net/" target="_blank">this</a> (by Becca, and what pushed me to write this post).</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><a href="http://www.disabilityrightsuk.org/news/2016/january/new-legal-judgment-denies-pip-those-facing-%E2%80%9Coverwhelming-psychological-distress%E2%80%9D" target="_blank">This post</a> from Disability Rights is pretty informative - a judgement has recently been announced, meaning that if someone with severe psychological distress cannot leave the house or go somewhere unassisted (for instance, due to severe agoraphobia, or panic attacks), they'll no longer be eligible for the mobility component of PIP, which currently stands at £55 or so a week. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">So what's the point of this post?</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Firstly, to give an explanation of (some aspects of) ESA, and an insight into how difficult it really is for people to survive on this benefit. Most people don't know the intricate details - and why would they? Unless they know someone who receives it, it isn't a great surprise.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">And then there's the issue of stigma. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Who would you tell that you're trying to live off less than £5,000 a year? You'll probably receive some housing benefit, but that won't be enough to cover your rent anyway, especially if you live in London. You might get DLA or PIP, but you live forever in fear of new reforms being announced and the small benefit you get (which, rather than being spent on the extra costs of being disabled is probably spent on heating your room and paying your water bill) being cut. If you've kids or people to care for, you probably worry about making sure you can feed them, too. If you don't have anyone to care for, like me, you're one of the luckier ones. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">When someone asks me what I do, I generally tell them the truth. Or a half truth. Partially because I think that I have a <i>duty</i> to, because it's so shameful. I need to make it less shameful. I need people to look me in the eye when I tell them I live off the state. And for the most part, they don't. They glance sideways, awkwardly, look down at their feet. They don't know what to say. And I try to continue the conversation as if nothing has happened. But it's hard. And it's exhausting when this happens frequently. And it does, because I try and do something social at least once a week, and that inevitably leads to meeting new people who ask what I do. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">What is most difficult about being in this situation, is how isolating it is - both on a personal and a national level. When tax credits were being cut, everyone was up in arms - including almost all of the media, which felt like a first. And I was glad, I really was. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">But when it comes to disability benefits being cut, we don't get much. We get a few Guardian articles, a few MPs ask questions on a Wednesday, but it doesn't go anywhere. It's accepted, passively. It's not worth the fight because we're not worth the fight. Our lives are not as valuable as the lives of people who can contribute to the economy, the people who pay taxes, the people who teach and educate and heal and work on our public transport and in our banks and in our shops and our taxis. Of course, the government is currently trying to dismantle the hard-won rights of those working in the public sector, but my point still stands.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">We need you - the activists, the politicians, the councillors, the workers, the trade unionists - to fight for us, because so often we can't fight for ourselves. We want to, but we can't. So much of our energy is taken up just by trying to survive. And when it comes to the end of the day, we don't have much left to give to activism, even though our lives depend on it.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">So please, in 2016 make the conscious decision to try and raise the profile of issues like ESA reforms and housing benefit cuts and PIP changes, and give us a platform when we have the energy to talk about it. Please make a commitment to fighting for the right of every disabled person in the UK to be able to live a life with access to healthcare, safety, and dignity. Because we can't do it alone, and as each day passes another disabled person loses their fight, and it feels like soon there will be none of us left. </span><br />
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Aisling Gallagherhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03368535232741519189noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5186809576962083474.post-88084998850855137022016-01-11T14:04:00.001-08:002016-01-11T14:04:37.038-08:00I am still trying to choose life, but it's hard.<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">CN suicide, eating disorders (specifically mentioning purging - but just a mention) </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">It has been almost two years since I've written a post on this blog.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Tonight a status from a Facebook friend on university, isolation, loneliness and mental health made me think I should try and find some words to talk about what's going on with me right now.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I'm supposed to be finishing my master's degree in August. I moved to London for this. I uprooted my life and got on a plane to go and do a degree. But I had to defer every assignment last year. I haven't even started an essay that was due last week. I wanted to finish on time, but I don't know if I'll make it. At this point, I just want it over with. Depression sucks every little bit of joy from the things in life you care about. I don't want to write about feminism, and I don't want to write papers and go to classes and have debates and think about Life After University, again. Like with my undergraduate, I have few friends in university. The false sense of security and hope I began to accumulate last year has broken into pieces now. I feel like an outsider on my own campus. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I am on a steady diet of painkillers, anti-depressants, mood stabilisers and benzodiazepines. I make myself get out of bed, at least three or four days a week, before 10am. I eat meals regularly, for the most part. I spend most of my time alone. I tell the voice in my head that there are no such things as safe foods and unsafe foods, that all bodies are good bodies, and that I will not put my fingers down the back of my throat even though it's all I can think of doing. I don't eat a varied diet, but at least I'm eating. Most of my meals are cereal or pasta and pesto. I spend too much money on food out.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">The doctors tell me I am Coping Very Well. That there is nothing they could tell me to do that I don't do already. I take my medication, I eat, I sleep, I get out of bed, I shower, though not as much as I should. I see friends. I have a partner. I am close to my family. I have interests outside of my degree and I am about to start long-term individual psychotherapy. They are uncomfortable when I talk about the impact that being poor has on my mental health. My DLA plus my housing benefit does not even cover my rent. Over two thirds of my income goes on my rent. They do not like talking about money and they know very little about benefits. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I continue to burst into tears at inappropriate moments. I've cried too many times to count in London Bridge station, when staff have been rude and dismissive and I'm in such agony that I can barely walk, never mind take the stairs. I've had panic attacks in bars full of people enjoying their Friday night, I've left events early because I'm suicidal and I've cursed the Jubilee line for being safe and having tube barriers at every platform. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I am exhausted and I am anxious. I am in need of a higher dose of my sedative, but need to wait to see a psychiatrist. I keep committing to things, and then hiding in my room for a few days instead. I have started to avoid looking at my emails. I always have twenty tabs open, always have a list of things to do. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I need people to be patient with me. I'm forever needing people to be patient with me, but I really mean it this time. Living with depression and anxiety is an experience common to many. But living with complex and severe mental illness, combined with a chronic pain and fatigue disorder, is different. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">My world has been grey for quite some time, and I don't know when the colour is going to come back into it. The cliched phrase 'you never know what someone is going through behind closed doors' comes to mind. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I am still trying to choose life, but it's hard. I cannot see the end of the week, never mind the end of the year. When I turned 23 a few weeks ago, I sat awake in bed at midnight in disbelief. When I was 17 and returning to my A Levels after several months off, I told myself I would be dead by my own hand before 20. I simply did not want to be alive for much longer than that. And while I'm still trying to keep myself alive, I cannot express in words how difficult a task that is. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Someone I follow on Twitter posted a graphic a few weeks ago, with the caption 'I imagine that this is what people who experience anxiety & depression must feel like'. I don't know this person, but they're a good few years older than me, at least. And I could not get my head around the fact that they had made it to that point in their life without experiencing any kind of depression. I cannot imagine a life like that. I daren't, because if I had lived a life without anxiety and depression, I cannot even begin to imagine the different place I would be in. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Rather than ending, as so many posts like this do, by telling people who feel horrific what <i>they </i>should be doing, I'll give a few suggestions of what you could do to better support your chronically ill and depressed friends.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">- Mental illness and ableism is part of a wider system of structural oppression in society. Do not forget this. Do not divorce this from your understanding of mental illness, stigma and treatment. There is a reason more black men are given medication rather than therapy, are sectioned at a much higher rate, and often given incorrect diagnoses of schizophrenia. White supremacy, sexism, homophobia, transphobia, Islamophobia play a massive part in why those who are unwell are prevented from getting better. The world is not built for people who are mentally ill, and it is doubly not built for those who are mentally ill and queer, mentally ill and black, etc. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">- Make it a regular part of your routine to tell the people in your life who you love that you love them. Normalise it. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">- Check in regularly with your depressed and disabled friends, and cut them some slack when they snap at you, or turn down your invitation out for the tenth time. Leaving the house is difficult.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">- Ask what you can do in general to help someone. For instance, I rarely forget to take medication. But many people find taking medication difficult to remember to do, and so a daily text to remind someone to take their pills can be a massive help. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">- Be kinder to one another. So much recent unnecessary cruelty directed my way has had a much huger impact on my mental health than those responsible would imagine it would have. Next time you go to write that passive aggressive tweet, or that insulting Facebook comment, ask yourself if it's really necessary. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">- People with severe mental illness do not expect you to be able to make it better. Nor are you expected to understand. Personally, what I would like, is when I tell someone I'm incredibly anxious, that they do not leave me to it because they are scared of getting it wrong. Tell the person that you are there if they need anything, ask what you can do to help. You'll build up trust, slowly. If you're scared of trying to cope, imagine what they feel like.</span><br />
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<br />Aisling Gallagherhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03368535232741519189noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5186809576962083474.post-71538032065762342932014-03-02T07:37:00.003-08:002014-03-02T07:37:53.897-08:00On Irishness, white privilege, and Being Different. <span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I have thought about writing a post on this for a while. A long time, actually, but never knew how to approach it. I didn't know how to make sense of the mess of thoughts and feelings in my head, never mind how to articulate them. But then I read an incredible piece by a wonderful woman I know that was verbalising the essence of what I've been trying to verbalise for months. As it obviously related directly to her life experience it was different, but the idea behind it was the same. So I'm going to get out what I've been wanting to get out for a long time.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">When I was little, I was so ashamed to be Irish. Mostly, my voice. My voice and my name. My voice and my accent and the accents of anyone from Northern Ireland on television, on the radio. It sounded so horrible. I spent all of my time playing games where I would adopt English or American accents, and I wouldn't have to be me, I was able to be someone else. On television, no one had Irish accents. The only time I heard them was on the news. Everyone else spoke so well, so beautifully, their voices didn't send pangs of shame and embarrassment up my spine. I longed for a name that people wouldn't ever have to ask how to pronounce, for a name that wouldn't make it so clear that I was Irish and therefore Different. I planned to change my name once I was old enough to. For my confirmation, I took the name Lucy, because I liked it and it was normal and no one ever had to ask how to pronounce Lucy. I thought that once I went to university, I might tell people my name was Lucy and finally carve out the identity I had always wanted for myself. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I had a stutter as a child, and I still have it now. That probably didn't help much. I sang in school and in choirs, because when you sang you didn't stutter, and you could hide your accent enough to make it sound like you were English. Like you had a Nice Voice. The kind that people would enjoy listening to. You could hide a stutter and an Irish accent when you sang. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Fast forward fifteen years. I started getting involved with NUS and visiting England relatively regularly. At one of my first conferences, we all had name badges, and a lot of people didn't know how to pronounce my name. When they asked, I told them. And that was usually the end of it. But then a woman told me that that wasn't how my name was pronounced. She laughed, like it was obvious to everyone but me. I told her that it was Irish, it was a different language. The language didn't operate by the same rules that English did. That was the reason it was pronounced the way it was. But she refused to accept it, and kept telling me I was wrong. That has stuck with me for a year, and it is something I often think about. I have never told the woman involved how hurtful it was. I was too scared to. But I suddenly became aware of how much I stuck out, the minute I opened my mouth. The Irish jokes came thick and fast throughout the conference. I smiled, but inside I wanted to cry. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I got further involved with NUS, and was flying out to meetings or conferences every few weeks. I became so much more aware, again, of how different I was. I felt like I was six years old again. People constantly told me to slow down. People made jokes about Irish stereotypes and the food that we ate and how much alcohol we drank and thought it was the most original, hilarious thing ever. I smiled weakly, rarely having the courage to tell them to fuck off. But I found it hurtful and patronising and the more I thought about it, the angrier I got. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I did not speak about this with anyone for a long time. I did not know how to approach it. It wasn't racism, and it wasn't xenophobia. It was something inbetween. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Let it be clear, I have white privilege. I am Very Very White. I carry with me every single privilege that comes with having white skin. I am not stopped and searched because I am white. Shop attendants do not follow me around thinking I might steal something. There are a magnitude of hair and beauty products in shops that are tailored to my skin tone and my hair. 107 of the 108 politicians sitting in Stormont reflect my skin colour. Northern Ireland is full of white people being represented on every possible platform, I see people who look like me on television and in plays and when I walk down the street. I have white privilege. </span><span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">I will be moving to England in a few months, and even there I will be the Good Kind of immigrant. Because I am white and educated and middle class and can pass for being heterosexual and don't have visible disabilities and have been socialised with many British cultural norms. I will blend in easily, because I look like everyone else and I am not Different. I will blend in easier than those from the south of Ireland, because of the magical world of borders and partition and jurisdictions. People will tell me that I am British, that I am Like Them, and will not accept it when I tell them I am not. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Eventually, I pluck up the courage to talk about this with a few excellent women I know. Who gave me the courage to announce to my committee at the training event that I was at that I was sick of jokes and comments and laughter and piss-taking of the fact I am Irish, and didn't want it anymore. And so I did, and some friends apologised for their part in it. It helped.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I have tried to be proud. I have tried to be proud of my culture and my heritage, and I am. I am thankful both my forename and surname reflect my background, even though inevitably it shows that it is clear I am a Catholic, went to Catholic schools, and probably define as an Irish nationalist. I am angry at what has happened to my ancestors at the hands of the British state. I am sick of having to defend this anger to people who think that because they were not directly involved, I should be polite and respectful to them while they disrespect and desecrate the memory of my family and the people who fought in defence of my country, labelling them as scumbag terrorists who deserve everything they got. I am Irish and I am working on trying to stop letting the rest of the world make me ashamed to be so. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">I don't quite know the point of this post, or what I am hoping to get out of it. It is the first time I have written about this, and the first time I will ever open up to a relatively large audience about this aspect of my identity and its influence on my life. It feels strange. </span>Aisling Gallagherhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03368535232741519189noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5186809576962083474.post-59428448803087568242014-02-27T13:43:00.001-08:002014-02-27T13:43:33.599-08:00Young Labour National Conference<div style="margin-bottom: 14pt; margin-top: 14pt;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Below is a copy of the email I sent to every member of the Young Labour Committee. I pretty much talk about what went wrong last weekend at the conference, and figured rather than writing a separate post, it would be just as easy to post a copy of the email for anyone who was interested in finding out what problems I had with it. TW for discussion of panic attacks & mental health.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /><br />Hi all,</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">My name is Aisling Gallagher, and last weekend I was one of the Northern Ireland CLP delegates to the Young Labour Conference. It was my first conference, and the first conference of the other delegates from my CLP. I'd mentioned to a few committee members that I was planning to email you all to talk about how last weekend went, and I thought I should email the entire committee rather than just a few people. I'd rather have the issues I'm bringing up brought up to everyone so it's as open and transparent as possible. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">No one needs me to tell them that there were a lot of problems with the way last weekend went. I think it's easiest/most accessible if I set it all out in a list rather than a massive block of text.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">1. Access in the venue. The main room had chairs packed quite closely together, and as the weekend went on the room got progressively more inaccessible, with stuff lying around and chairs moved around, particularly for anyone who might need to use mobility equipment to help them get around. As Simon mentioned in one of the caucuses, it was also an incredibly difficult room to chair in. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">2. Arrangements before the conference. Not being told where the venue was or being sent the agenda far enough in advance is incredibly bad for access (anxiety issues, people who need to plan far in advance schedules, etc.), and where possible should be sent out at least a fortnight before the conference. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">3. As a general rule it's a good idea to have a quick ten minutes on accessibility at the start of a conference. I got involved in YL through being involved with NUS, and it's done at the beginning of every NUS event. It sets out clearly what accessibility is (because i don't expect everyone to come to a conference knowing liberation inside out and I'm sure none of you do, either), what behaviours are and are not acceptable, and provides a point of contact and a safeguarding number in case anyone needs it (for instance; no whooping, no clapping while someone is speaking, that kind of thing- understandably members can be confused over this because at Labour Conference we're encouraged to clap while people speak, at NUS events we only clap once people are finished speaking, and at other groups and meetings sometimes the only clapping done is the sign language gesture for it, so it's good to have a general rule and stick to it). </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">It means that everyone in the room is at least on the same page to some degree when it comes to how to conduct themselves at the conference. It doesn't solve every problem but it is generally a good thing to programme in. It also usually informs people where the safe space room is. The fact there was no safe space room and no safe guarding number is nothing short of a disgrace. I don't know who's to blame for it, but there was a safe space room at Labour Students (as far as I'm aware?), and so the excuse that I've heard ('there wasn't an available room for it') really doesn't stand up to much. I sincerely hope this won't be repeated at any future YL event, and unfortunately what happened last weekend showed how necessary these things are to have in place for every single event.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">4. *That* debate. Since conference I've spoken to more people and found out more about the way Young Labour operates. I still can't really get my head around the fact that there isn't a constitution or a set of standing orders. This was talked about in a caucus, and whilst it seems whoever were the main organisers wanted the atmosphere to be a little more relaxed and informal seeing as there weren't elections (bar women's officer), this entirely backfired. <i>You will never have an accessible debate if there are no rules governing how the debate is conducted</i>. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">At the time I didn't know there were no standing orders, and so my anxiety/panic attack was probably brought on by the fact I just thought people were being purposely obtuse, but now I know it wasn't as simple as that. I'm not defending the actions of people (on all sides of the debate, not that it matters), but I do have some sympathy with the view that they felt there was no option but to heckle because they weren't being listened to, felt completely powerless, and the chair had complete power over how the debate was conducted. I don't know what people think about this, but I (and many others I spoke to at the conference, particularly first time delegates) think it is crucial YL write up some standing orders for how debates are conducted. It isn't an unreasonable request, and I still don't understand how YL has managed to get by for so long without any. There are plenty of hacks, both within and outside the committee, who I'm sure would be more than willing to help draw up a draft standing orders document. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">That space on Saturday was the most toxic environment I have ever been in, caused the first panic attack I'd had in months, and many disabled people including myself then had to run and hide in disabled bathrooms afterwards because there wasn't a safe space room. I left conference soon after, and didn't come back until the next day. The only reason I came back was because I wanted to go to disabled members' caucus, and my CLP had spent a considerable amount of money sending me over, but I do know of many people who left and didn't come back. I'm only sending this email now because I've been almost bedbound all week, in all likelihood as the effect the weekend has taken on my mental health. I don't believe the debate would've gotten as out of hand as it did if there were rules governing how it was to be conducted, with proper processes in place (like having the ability to challenge the chair, or propose a motion to vote in secret ballot or whatever). </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I don't believe this was the intention of anyone on the committee or anyone who organised it all, but this is the reality that these situations bring. Putting 200 Labour Party members into a room and asking them to debate a contentious topic with no rules governing how it's to be done is a recipe for disaster. Access isn't a buzzword and it isn't something I throw about lightly. I don't care how you voted and I don't care if you're a Blairite or a Bennite or you're a trot or a closet Tory; this isn't about the topic of the debate or factionalism or any of that bullshit. I haven't been involved for very long and I'm on no 'side'. But I do believe our political spaces must be as accessible as possible if they are to be inclusive, and it would worry me if the committee did not share this belief. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">5. The factional in-fighting and arguing all over the internet after the aforementioned debate didn't help either, but I also know it's not something anyone can individually tackle. But I was really disappointed to see so many people, on both sides and of all political persuasions, throwing about access as a political tool and/or as a piss-take of its importance. Ditto people speaking over/ignoring women when they were chairing, or people generally just disrespecting them in a way that definitely would not have happened if they were men. Again, not anything you can do, but if people could take this back to their relevant "camps" that would be appreciated. Because, unsurprisingly, I know they won't listen to me if I tell them this because I am just some mouthy Irish woman with a lot to say (any time I tried to bring up anything about access or anything even remotely related, it was largely ignored). If men want to be good allies to feminism, never mind wanting to call yourself feminists, then please get your houses in order. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">6. I also can't get my head around the fact out of an entire weekend there were only two hours dedicated to debating policy. The requirement of ten signatories to submit a motion isn't great either, but it isn't anywhere near as bad as the fact you can only put your name to one motion. I understand it stops factionalising as much, but it makes it significantly harder for people in less well known areas or those who don't have connections to submit policy. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">7. No one has really taken responsibility for the agenda, either. Every committee member I've spoken to so far has said they didn't see it before it was published. That doesn't seem to make sense either. It'd be good to know who was responsible for setting out the agenda, because there were a number of problems with it and I would like to have a commitment that there will be an effort to ensure this doesn't happen again. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">This email is long, and I'm not really sorry, because all of these things need to be said, and I'm sure a lot of people who feel the same are very burnt out now and so probably haven't gotten round to emailing in feedback on how it went. On a positive note, the fact every chair always went out of their way to see if women wanted to speak in plenary sessions/debates/etc was very very welcome, and I definitely haven't seen it done to the extent it was done at the weekend before. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Feel free to get back to me individually or however you wish to if you want to talk about this further, with the understanding that it might take me a while to respond because I'm dealing with bad health at the minute along with NUS conference season and a dissertation. At times during the weekend I swore to myself that I wasn't going to come back or get involved again, so I'm sending this because I <i>do </i>believe YL can and should be doing better, and I want to help make sure this happens, particularly because I'll be moving to England in a few months and want to take a more active role in the party. But we need to get our shit together if we want people to <i>want</i> to come back and get involved.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Cheers,</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Aisling</span></div>
Aisling Gallagherhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03368535232741519189noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5186809576962083474.post-53232711885035555542013-10-28T13:43:00.000-07:002013-10-28T13:43:01.672-07:00Poppygate, and why students' unions should follow ULU's example.<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Last year, Dan Cooper, vice-president of the University of London Union, <a href="http://cheesegratermagazine.org/investigations/2012/12/13/down-your-union.html" target="_blank">declined to lay a wreath at ULU's remembrance Sunday service</a>, and this quickly resulted in a Tory-led campaign to oust him from his post. Of course the whole episode became known as Poppygate. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Unsurprisingly, the same thing has happened this year.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">The <a href="http://london-student.net/news/10/28/ulu-will-represented-remembrance-service/" target="_blank">Senate of ULU has passed a motion</a> stating that "ULU's elected representatives have the liberty to choose" whether to go to this year's service in a personal capacity, but that they cannot go in their ULU capacity. Essentially, this means they can't go and claim to represent the 120,000 students who make up ULU, but that they are perfectly entitled to go on their own behalf. President of ULU, Michael Chessum, then <a href="http://www.telegraph.co.uk/education/universityeducation/10409794/Student-leaders-impose-ban-on-Remembrance-service.html" target="_blank">made it clear that he wasn't planning to attend</a>, and that choosing to attend or not is in itself a political statement. Cue Poppygate 2.0.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I'm going to talk about why I think it is a good thing ULU have adopted this position, and why I fully support my friends and activist colleagues in their decision- not least because Michael's already been subject to a load of abusive emails because he had the audacity to call out the farce that is the state's hijacking of remembrance day. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I'm Irish. I live in Belfast and have lived here for my entire life. I'm not religious at all, but culturally I am a Catholic. Essentially, that means I tick 'member of the Roman Catholic community' on equality monitoring forms, because I come from a Catholic background. My mum comes from West Belfast, and my dad comes from Omagh. I was born in 1992, so I'm part of the generation who have grown up post-Troubles (or rather, post-what-people-say-is-the-end-of-the-Troubles-but-it's-actually-a-lot-more-complicated-than-that, but that is a topic for a different blog post), the Good Friday Agreement wasn't signed until I was 6 years old, but naturally I don't really remember much of the political world around me when I was that age.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I've gone to Catholic schools my entire life. And I love history- my entire family loves history. But I didn't get to learn about Irish history until I chose the subject for GCSE, and then learnt about it in further depth when I studied it for A Level. People can deny it all they want, but the reality is that British state played a massive role in exacerbating the conflict here, killed plenty of innocent people, and is still trying to worm its way out of taking much responsibility for the generations worth of devastation they've left behind. And for a lot of this, they used the military.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">A few years ago, I worked in IKEA. And a lot of the security guards there (who I spent most of my days in relatively close contact with) were ex-military. I would talk for hours with them about Northern Ireland and the Troubles, and they helped make what was a menial and often frustrating accessibility-wise job a lot more interesting, and they were wonderful people.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">But they didn't get to choose to do what they had to do. That was their job as soldiers.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">The British state wrecked havoc in Northern Ireland throughout the Troubles, from internment to state collusion with loyalist paramilitaries; and to this day both they and many politicians in Northern Ireland refuse to own up to the part that the state played in the conflict here. Unfortunately, the army plays to the tune of the state. What the state wants, the army does. Just a few weeks ago, the current government was getting ready to send the military to Syria. The people fighting wars they don't understand and dying for causes they can't quite justify aren't those making the decision to send daughters, husbands, sons, parents, brothers, friends, colleagues to their death. They're ordinary people, doing the state's bidding.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Like it or not, poppies no longer represent what they initially were created for. Every year we have remembrance services where those in power in the state talk about our military and giving thanks to their courage, whilst handily forgetting that when current soldiers often come back from tours of Afghanistan, it's up to charities to mend what's been broken. The state absolves all responsibility, or at least most of it. Many charities end up picking up the pieces of soldiers who have come home and been abandoned by those who sent them out to fight in the first place. The army are there when the state and those in power want a good few photo ops, whenever they want to use these men and women as political footballs in their petty little game, but whenever it comes to providing affordable housing, a decent standard of education, accessible mental and physical health services, and leveling the playing field in terms of equality of opportunity for these people and their families, the state hangs them out to dry. Nationalism and patriotism can result in a dangerous ability to overlook the things, or lack of, that your state is providing for you in the name of service to your country.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I'm not a pacifist anymore, because I know holding that belief is a luxury afforded to those who have never had to fight for anything. But I also don't support the British state, and by extension, the British military. I don't support what they did in Northern Ireland in the last fifty years, and I don't support the war they've raged on Irish people and my ancestors for centuries. This blog post has barely scratched the surface. Of course I do not think those who choose to wear poppies are all British imperialists, held bent on oppressing Ireland- but I also think that these conversations are too important to ignore, and unfortunately in Northern Ireland, we keep pushing these conversations away. If we are to have a truly integrated shared future, it is time to ask the difficult questions and provide the difficult answers- how can the state expect ex-paramilitaries to do this when they won't lead by example? </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Unfortunately, this is probably too contentious a thing for many people who are in the public eye to come out and say, and I have the luxury of not being in that position. But if my own students' union can't come out and take a strong anti-war and anti-imperialist position, I'm glad a students' union across the water can. </span>Aisling Gallagherhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03368535232741519189noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5186809576962083474.post-15063032782097872732013-10-16T16:01:00.003-07:002013-10-16T16:01:55.036-07:00A letter to my 16-year-old self.<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Trigger; suicide, depression, sexual harassment, panic attacks, eating disorders</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">You do go back to school. You spend ten days in Italy doing nothing but reading books and it reminds you why you don't want to stop learning. You decide that school is the best option, for now.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">But you leave, again. The frequent absences add up until you've left for (what seems like) good. You spend months at home with your mum caring for you. You are too scared to leave the house. You don't want people to see what you have become. School becomes a distant memory. You come back for a day in May and have a panic attack in a room full of the girls in your year.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">You come back for your last year. And you work harder than you've ever worked before to make up for lost time, you do it because the thought of having to spend more than another year in that hell hole is the only thought worse than going back to the black depression. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">You fall in love. You realise you've become one of those people who falls in love after a few weeks. And you don't care.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">You don't get into the university you dreamed of. You cry. A lot. You don't really get over it. But you know if you'd ended up there it would be doing the wrong degree, and you probably wouldn't have made it through first year. You'd probably be dead, realistically. You stop caring that people get awkward whenever you talk so openly about your mental health. You didn't care that much to begin with, but you really don't care now. Fuck them.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">You give in and go to a private therapist. You won't let your parents make you go for weeks because you don't want to sacrifice the principles your family holds so close to their heart. But you go, because it's a choice between going or dying. And you want to want to do the former.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">You break someone's heart. You think that it's the worst thing you can ever feel.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">You move out. Away from the eyes of your parents, you stop eating completely. You start your path down the slippery slope you always thought you could avoid.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">But then you meet someone. And you tell them you're falling in love with them in a smoking area of a club, and they tell you the same, and things seem like they could be okay for once. You take a chance and book flights. You start to live spontaneously. You think you might be happy, for once.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">But things aren't good, and things aren't happy, and you try to kill yourself again, and then you have your heart broken, and you don't think you'll ever recover. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">But you do. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Sort of. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Life is liveable. Even though you're on your own.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">You realise things about yourself. You grow. You are an adult. You are Queer. You breathe a sigh of relief when you discover that you are n</span><span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">ot Wrong. You are just different. But you are harassed, you are assaulted, you become used to carrying your keys in your fists when you walk home at night.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">But the black doesn't stop because of your new found identities, and the depression doesn't leave just because you think you can live your life alone, and you ink the words of a poem on your arm in an attempt to keep yourself alive, in an attempt to try to make yourself <i>want</i> to stay alive.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">And then suddenly you are twenty years old, and sitting in your bedroom alone; and you've had to take a valium to make sure you can sleep because you've spent the day receiving abuse and people telling you to kill yourself on the internet because you spoke on the radio about abortion.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Suddenly your life begins to have some sort of meaning, some meaning bigger than yourself, something concerned with thousands of faceless women who travel to the UK every year to have an abortion, and suddenly you realise that you can't leave, just yet. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">You try to sleep, and hope that tomorrow will be better. You are tired of waiting for tomorrow. But there is nothing else you can do.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>Aisling Gallagherhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03368535232741519189noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5186809576962083474.post-36066286984292578852013-10-06T14:28:00.000-07:002013-10-06T14:28:52.129-07:00On activism. <span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Trigger warning for discussion of suicide, depression, eating disorders, fascism, racism, the police, medication, self harm</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">We're exhausted. We've either just finished a fifty-hour work week with a conference and a night of drinking at the weekend, or we're struggling to cope with the effect our clinical depression is having on our assignments and attendance at uni, or we're trying to do all of these things at once. We are planning the next protest, the next demo, the next conference, but forget to plan in a meal. We try to take care of one another but never take care of ourselves. We haven't slept properly in months.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">We're fed up. We're fed up of explaining to our family why you can't separate the politics from the person. Fed up of being told we should respect members of a party who are literally taking money from those who need it to survive and killing them, fed up of being told to shut up and listen to someone who thinks we shouldn't have the right to control our own bodies, fed up of racist immigration controls and fascists given airtime and just about every decision made at the top, with no thought of those at the bottom. We are angry, so angry, that we don't know what to do with it. Sometimes we collapse, exhausted, in floods of tears, because we cannot for the life of us understand why anyone could do this to another human being. We cry on one another, we support one another, we give one another hope that tomorrow can be better. We miss the release of the razor. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">We've been arrested recently, we've been manhandled by the police, thrown mercilessly to the ground by several officers, and peers have the audacity to claim that this was somehow justifiable. We've been banned from protesting on our own campuses. We've been left in a cell mid-panic attack, and released 48 hours later. We're sick of people telling us that there's nothing wrong with the police, and we're sick of the state letting fascists march down our roads. We drag ourselves out of bed and stand as a blockade, trying to deal with the police and the fascists and the voice in our head telling us to kill ourselves. We have a panic attack in the kettle, and the police won't let us out. We go home and sleep for twenty hours.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">We're counting the pennies to have enough to buy our medication in England, or we're sitting in Scotland and Northern Ireland feeling sorry for those who don't get them for free. We're hopelessly waiting for the next psychiatrist appointment, we're still at the bottom of the CBT waiting list, we don't know how to explain why we can't eat or sleep and we don't know what to say to our friends who are feeling like this too. We have enough scars between us to tell a hundred stories. We have to leave our medication on the kitchen table or we won't remember to take it, or the thoughts will come back again. Our interactions with people take place via the internet.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">We spend weeks looking forward to seeing one another, to spend time with those we love, those who understand. But then we spend too much time awake wanting to die. Or rather, something triggers it, and then suddenly we've spent the cost of two return trips to the UK on a flight home from London because we didn't trust ourselves to be alone in a place with tubes and not try to commit suicide again, all the valium in the world would not shut up the voices inside our heads, and the only way we feel like we can talk about these experiences is through writing a blog on a Sunday night. Or maybe that's just me. And we worry that writing about this will make people concerned. But we don't know what else to do.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">We have dysfunctional relationships within our activist circles, mostly because they're our friendship circles too, and our room mates, and half the time we work with one another, too. We have issues with attachment, we have issues with self-worth, we have a fucked up head and we don't know what to do with it, so we hurt one another. Our relationships are unstable, like our health. We can't be there for one another, because it's happening to everyone. We cry alone in our rooms because we don't want to be a burden. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">We can't reconcile our feminism with our own bodies. We can't stop ourselves developing eating disorders, but we curse ourselves for not being able to fight it. We restrict, we binge, we purge, but most importantly, we keep it a secret. We all have problems and we don't want to look like we're asking for sympathy, even when we're in tears each night because we had the audacity to allow our bodies to consume food. We can't look at ourselves in the mirror without our lip shaking. We preach body positivity, we deplore body shaming, and we berate ourselves for wishing we were thinner.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">We can't escape. We can't escape because even when we have left the demo, even when we have stopped talking about welfare reforms, when we have stopped arguing with Tories, we are left in this world we live in. We are left in this place that condemns us for being ill, that hates us because we are women, that will leave us to die because we are disabled. To separate the politics from the person we recognise that one must be privileged enough to remain unaffected by the politics. We spend every single fucking minute living in this hell of a patriarchal capitalist shit hole that has dragged each and every one of us to the bottom, and is determined to keep us there, no matter how much our arms flail and our hearts ache from the pain of it all. It wants to kill us and it will not stop until we are dead.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">We try to keep telling ourselves that we need to be the living breathing reminder for others that there is good in the world, that there is hope, that there is pain but that there is also art, but eventually we break. Eventually, we stop telling ourselves that, and we stop being that person for other people. We want to cling to hope, to live by Andrea Gibson's words that <i>all they knew of hate was that it couldn't beat the love out of me</i>, but one day we stop. We can't do it anymore. We can't keep pretending that we're winning this fight, because we aren't. We're losing. We're broken. They've broken us. All that is left to do is write.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>Aisling Gallagherhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03368535232741519189noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5186809576962083474.post-78051651286873587512013-09-11T08:59:00.000-07:002013-09-11T08:59:43.757-07:00Edinburgh, summer, suicide.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Trigger warning; suicide. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">For most of the summer, I lived in Edinburgh, working at the Edinburgh Festival Fringe. It was an experience, to say the least. Working six days a week for six weeks for no money was difficult. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">It's worth pointing out, though, that we were one of the better treated groups of workers who did the festival. We were given £40 a week for food and given good accommodation, which is a lot more than many other workers are given. The problem is that there are a line of people waiting to take your place if you drop out, so the only people who can afford to work there are those desperate to get into the arts industry and/or those who are rich enough to subsidise themselves while they work. That and the fact that there are no unions for the workers.. but anyway. I digress. It was something that angered me throughout my stay in Edinburgh (that, and how inaccessible Edinburgh/the festival itself was), but it isn't the main point of this post.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I will ill for most of it. It was the first major depressive period I'd had since the spring, I think. Except this time I didn't have a doctor I could go to, or a mum who could help support me. It made me realise how much I rely on my parents, and how lucky I am to have them be able to support me in the various ways that they are able to. Too many people I know can't access this kind of support simply because of money or distance or bullshit like that, and when I'm myself (ie. when I'm not ill), this kind of thing makes me absolutely furious. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">When I was in Edinburgh things were bad. I didn't really have the support network of friends that I thought I had there, either. I mean, I have some friends up there, but only one or two would I feel comfortable going to in the state that I was in for a lot of the time I was there. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">It got to the point where I was making plans, almost everyday, and waiting to carry them out. I was planning to kill myself for most of the time I was awake. I couldn't tell my parents at home because they would (understandably) worry. I couldn't tell the people I worked with because we didn't have that kind of relationship. I talked to my mum about cutting the trip short and coming home early, but I couldn't leave the company without me for the rest of the festival, because they only had about ten of us working. I've pretty much lost count of the number of times I cried in bathrooms or walking home or trying my best not to when I was on a front of house shift at the venue. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">It came to a head when I rang my mum, explaining all that I could without worrying her too much, and we talked about whether I should leave. I counted down the days until I left, and I knew that I had Committee Training the last week of August, and that all of my travel had been booked for it, that I'd see some of my friends, that it was worth trying to hold on till then. And somehow, I managed to.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Before I came home, I got a tattoo. The tattoo is from <a href="http://apoemaday.tumblr.com/post/18671861074/instead-of-killing-yourself" target="_blank">this poem</a>. The poem has hung in my room for the past two years, above my bed. I know it almost off by heart. In as far as possible, it means I'm reminded what it can't do, what it won't change. Permanently inked on my skin, it'll be there until I die. And unfortunately, I think I'll need to be reminded of this for a while yet. </span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhe_xY8DFKMopwcFq-yK7_t6Z3Vtj42cEoTbZXmnFNcoE1zRDw5epThYnql7oYZgyTWh_1lc4RroZIFTaryWjhuda67toQFa6o62vGqH-xY4o0HvAAEozSvgn6bLboRx-jtCaC2pxDPcXaC/s1600/545208_10151548107747385_871321083_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhe_xY8DFKMopwcFq-yK7_t6Z3Vtj42cEoTbZXmnFNcoE1zRDw5epThYnql7oYZgyTWh_1lc4RroZIFTaryWjhuda67toQFa6o62vGqH-xY4o0HvAAEozSvgn6bLboRx-jtCaC2pxDPcXaC/s400/545208_10151548107747385_871321083_n.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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<br />Aisling Gallagherhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03368535232741519189noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5186809576962083474.post-39051058131239196202013-07-27T12:18:00.000-07:002013-07-27T12:18:01.847-07:00<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I've been quiet on here for a while.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I'm in Edinburgh at the minute, I'll be here working for the next five weeks.<br />I spent most of June in London, mostly with friends.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Things are hard.<br />Health is difficult.<br />I have spent what feels like every waking moment thinking about food and weight and appearance recently. I don't know how to stop it coming back, and I don't know why it's coming back, either. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Today when I was walking to work I felt happy, momentarily, for the first time since getting here. Hopefully it'll become more frequent, or at least happen again.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">The world can be quite a lonely place.</span>Aisling Gallagherhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03368535232741519189noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5186809576962083474.post-3299627510939744532013-07-09T13:41:00.002-07:002013-07-09T13:41:19.647-07:00ACTION ALERT- stop the prosecution of a woman falsely accused of prostitution who faces prison for breaching an ASBO<div style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19.5px;">
I've been sent this by the English Collective of Prostitues, an organisation based in London who represent sex workers. You can find their website here: <a href="http://prostitutescollective.net/" rel="nofollow" style="color: #3b5998; cursor: pointer; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank">http://prostitutescollective.net/</a>.</div>
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<strong>ACTION ALERT . . .</strong></div>
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<strong>Stop the prosecution of a woman falsely accused of prostitution who faces prison for breaching an Anti-social Behaviour Order.</strong></div>
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Please write urgently to protest this injustice to the addresses below. This prosecution is not in the public interest and should be dropped (model letter below).</div>
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To: Keir Starmer, Director of Public Prosecutions <span class="fbUnderline" style="text-decoration: underline;">privateoffice@cps.gsi.gov.uk</span></div>
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CPS, Rose Court, 2 Southwark Bridge, London SE1 9HS</div>
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Cc: CPS North East Case Progression Team <span class="fbUnderline" style="text-decoration: underline;">london.magistratesnortheast@cps.gsi.gov.uk</span>The Cooperage 8 Gainsford Street, Bermondsey, SE1 2NE (DX161230 Bermondsey 4).</div>
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Rushanara Ali MP <span class="fbUnderline" style="text-decoration: underline;">rushanara.ali.mp@parliament.uk</span></div>
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House of Commons, London, SW1A 0AA020 7219 7200</div>
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347 Cambridge Heath Road, London, E2 9RA</div>
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And: English Collective of Prostitutes <span class="fbUnderline" style="text-decoration: underline;">ecp@prostitutescollective.net</span> 0207482 2496</div>
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On Friday 12 July, 10am at Stratford Magistrates Court, Ms CH faces charges of breaching an Anti-social Behaviour Order (ASBO) which bans her from loitering throughout the whole borough of Tower Hamlets for 26 years. This offence carries a maximum sentence of five years in prison.</div>
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Ms CH is not guilty of loitering. She lives in Tower Hamlets -- her home is in the red-light area!</div>
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What is the evidence needed to prove loitering? “Standing on a street corner looking in the direction of several men” has been enough in some cases. So it isn’t what you do, it is who you are that seems to be the greatest proof of street prostitution. How is a woman who has worked in the past ever able to defend herself and be believed when the case relies on hearsay evidence from the police alone and is heard before magistrates who rubber stamp what the police say.</div>
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Ms CH was given the ASBO about four years ago when she was ill and not in a position to challenge it.</div>
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There are other factors in this case that should be taken into account:</div>
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Ms Hughes is the devoted mother of a three-year-old boy.</div>
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Ms Hughes is also a victim of rape and other violence. She has been attacked countless times while working but only reported one attack to the police — she felt compelled to do so because her injuries were so severe and she feared that the man would attack other women.</div>
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In the name of women’s safety, ASBOs must be abolished. They are used to unfairly target sex workers for arrest and imprisonment and shunt women around, often into more isolated areas, where they are more at risk of violence.</div>
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<strong>Protest outside </strong><strong>Stratford Magistrates Court 9.30 – 10.30, Friday 12 July and then attend court to support Ms CH.</strong><strong> </strong></div>
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Model letter:</div>
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Dear</div>
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I write [<em>add something about your circumstances and why you are concerned/protesting</em>] to ask that the prosecution of Ms CH for breaching an Anti-social Behaviour Order (ASBO) be dropped. The ASBO is draconian. It bans her from loitering throughout the whole borough of Tower Hamlets for 26 years. Breaching an ASBO carries a maximum sentence of five years in prison</div>
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Ms CH lives in Tower Hamlets -- her home is in the red-light area. Every time she leaves her house she risks being arrested for loitering regardless of what she is doing. On this occasion she was waiting for a taxi. ASBOs are deeply unfair. They are given out on the basis of hearsay evidence from the police. No-one needs to come to court to give evidence that a nuisance was caused to them. Magistrates nearly always rubber stamp the police evidence.</div>
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A conviction for breaching an ASBO could wreck Ms CH’s life.</div>
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Pursuing ASBOs against sex workers undermines safety, shunts women around often into more isolated areas where they are more at risk of violence. The Metropolitan Police have acknowledged that it deters women from reporting violence. At a time when more women are going into prostitution to feed themselves and their families, why isn’t help being provided instead of criminalisation and imprisonment.</div>
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There is no public interest in pursuing this case and we urge you to drop the prosecution.</div>
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Sincerely,</div>
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Aisling Gallagherhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03368535232741519189noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5186809576962083474.post-31350292923362504592013-06-10T09:15:00.002-07:002013-06-10T10:42:48.834-07:00Response to a letter posted on the Belfast Telegraph website about
victim blaming.<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 13px;">(Response to Sue Alexander's email on 10th June as appeared on the Belfast Telegraph website)</span><br style="font-size: 13px;"><br style="font-size: 13px;"><span style="font-size: 13px;">Victim blaming (that is, proportioning blame on to the victim of a crime rather than blaming the perpetrator) is coming up again and again in the recent discourse surrounding rape.</span><br style="font-size: 13px;"><br style="font-size: 13px;"><span style="font-size: 13px;">Victim blaming is an attempt to place blame for the crime (in particular in a case of rape) on the victim rather than blaming the perpetrator. This happens in ways such as telling women they should not consume too much alcohol, by telling women they should not walk home alone at night (which doesn't make sense, as statistically most rapes are committed by a person known to the victim), by telling women how they should and should not dress and that this is a responsibility of theirs in order not to attract unwanted attention.</span><br style="font-size: 13px;"><br style="font-size: 13px;"><span style="font-size: 13px;">Women should never carry any blame or be made to feel in any way responsible for what is a hideous, terrible thing to happen to someone, and the only person who is at fault in a situation of rape is the rapist, never the victim. We need to keep repeating this. You shouldn't have to teach your daughters how to minimalise risks to themselves- we should be teaching our sons not to rape.</span><br style="font-size: 13px;"><br style="font-size: 13px;"><span style="font-size: 13px;">Aisling Gallagher</span><br style="font-size: 13px;"><span style="font-size: 13px;">NUS-USI Women's Officer</span></span>Aisling Gallagherhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03368535232741519189noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5186809576962083474.post-22267102217755665122013-06-10T05:10:00.000-07:002013-06-10T05:10:01.957-07:00It's time to put consent on the curriculum. <div style="border: 0px; list-style: none; margin-bottom: 14px; padding: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Tomorrow there will be a vote on an amendment to the Children & Families Bill to include Sex & Relationship Education in the national curriculum. If the amendment is carried, it will go into the bill.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><a href="http://www.womensaid.org.uk/page.asp?section=0001000100100024&sectionTitle=Compulsory+Healthy+Relationship+Education" style="border: 0px; color: #0088c3; cursor: pointer; list-style: none; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none;" target="_hplink">Women's Aid</a> and <a href="http://www.brook.org.uk/index.php/campaigns/435-children-and-families-bill-and-pshe" style="border: 0px; color: #0088c3; cursor: pointer; list-style: none; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none;" target="_hplink">Brook</a> are supporting the amendment, and are urging people to contact their MPs ahead of the vote tomorrow to ensure that it passes.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Why is it so important?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Currently, sex education is compulsory on the national curriculum, but it focuses primarily on the mechanics and biological aspects of sex, as well as focusing on good sexual health. This amendment <a href="http://obruk.wordpress.com/2013/06/07/lets-teach-the-children-well-5-days-to-put-sexual-consent-into-the-national-curriculum/" style="border: 0px; color: #0088c3; cursor: pointer; list-style: none; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none;" target="_hplink">"puts the R into sex education"</a> - families can and do play a key role in educating children, but high quality sex education delivered to both boys and girls is a vital tool in empowering young people to overcome societal and cultural pressures around sex education and consent. Sex education isn't just about the biology of sex- it is important that young people learn about the societal aspects of sex and sex in relationships, and particularly about consent.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">The programme of sex education delivered in schools should be grounded in a zero tolerance approach to violence against women and girls. By including this amendment in the overall bill, it ensures that schools will be given the resources and materials necessary to adequately equip teachers to carry out the education effectively.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Shadow Home Affairs Minister Stella Creasy said that it is essential we teach children about consent- there have been repeated calls for it and still nothing has been done. It's important not only for young people to know about the biological aspect of sex, but to respect one another and have healthy relationships. Essentially, <a href="http://www.brook.org.uk/index.php/campaigns/435-children-and-families-bill-and-pshe" style="border: 0px; color: #0088c3; cursor: pointer; list-style: none; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none;" target="_hplink">it's time to put consent on the curriculum</a>.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">My experience of sex education is probably quite different to that of young people in England and Wales- and unfortunately this bill doesn't extend to Northern Ireland. However, I believe it's essential that we should be pushing MPs to vote for the amendment, regardless of whether or not it affects our own constituency.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">The sex education in Northern Ireland is unsurprisingly strongly influenced by the highly conservative, anti-women, anti-LGBT culture we live in. I didn't receive any sex education. Instead, we had 'social education', where at the age of 12 we awkwardly were talked to about periods and where babies come from. I went to an all girls Catholic school- the most adequate education I received about contraception was in my GCSE Biology class (and when my friend first told me about the implant, I thought she was making it up- which is funny now, but at the age of 15 or 16 with the little education I got, it probably isn't that uncommon amongst students in Catholic schools).</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">This bill won't cover Northern Ireland, which is already a good few steps behind the UK on a number of important issues, but it will introduce the issue of consent into schools in England and Wales and this is a massive, much-needed step forward. It means that, eventually, a similar kind of thing will be introduced into Northern Ireland, despite the fact that it will probably not be for many years.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">You can <a href="http://www.parliament.uk/mps-lords-and-offices/mps/" style="border: 0px; color: #0088c3; cursor: pointer; list-style: none; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none;" target="_hplink">search for your MP here</a>, and contact them ahead of the vote on the amendment tomorrow. It's time to put consent on the curriculum, and tomorrow is an opportunity to do just that.</span></div>
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Aisling Gallagherhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03368535232741519189noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5186809576962083474.post-70814750555551877042013-06-03T06:43:00.000-07:002013-06-03T06:43:24.329-07:00Special Advisers Bill<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>NB: This is a personal blog, and<b> I speak about this bill as an individual</b>. I'm not speaking for the Labour Party, nor am I speaking for the SDLP or NUS-USI. I'm speaking as myself, and will be held account as an individual. If you have any problems or concerns with what I have said, talk to me about them- not my political parties. These words do not reflect any political party nor political organisation. </i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>PDF of the final Bill: </i></span><a href="http://www.niassembly.gov.uk/Documents/Legislation/Bills/Non-Executive%20Bills/Session-2011-12/Civil%20Service%20(Special%20Advisers)%20Bill.pdf">http://www.niassembly.gov.uk/Documents/Legislation/Bills/Non-Executive%20Bills/Session-2011-12/Civil%20Service%20(Special%20Advisers)%20Bill.pdf</a><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>Copy of the Belfast Agreement: </i></span><a href="http://cain.ulst.ac.uk/events/peace/docs/agreement.htm#rights">http://cain.ulst.ac.uk/events/peace/docs/agreement.htm#rights</a><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">The Civil Service (Special Advisers) Bill is causing a lot of controversy. In the last fortnight we've seen a lot of immature, childish, and pretty libellous things said about parties and individuals on both sides of the debate. This is a debate that needs to be had with great sensitivity and respect. We're talking about the lives of innocent people who have died during a period of intense conflict- essentially, it was a war.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">The Bill stipulates for the appointed "special adviser not to have serious criminal conviction", which means a conviction for which "a sentence of imprisonment of five years or more was imposed" or "a sentence of imprisonment for life was imposed" and applies "whether the person was convicted in Northern Ireland or elsewhere, was convicted before or after the coming into operation of this Act".</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">"The Department must issue a code governing the appointment of special advisers within 3 months of this section coming into operation" and "the appointment of special advisers must be subject to the same vetting procedures as the appointment of Senior Civil Servants to the Northern Ireland Civil Service". </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">A number of amendments were proposed by Dominic Bradley & Alban Maginness- all of which were rejected by Jim Allister, the proposer of the bill. Unsurprisingly. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">The Good Friday Agreement of 1998 stipulates that "the parties affirm their commitment to the mutual respect, the civil rights and the religious liberties of everyone in the community... the right to pursue democratically national and political aspirations, the right to seek constitutional change by peaceful and legitimate means... the right to equal opportunity in all social and economic activity... the right of women to full and equal political participation". </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">"The achievement of a peaceful and just society would be the true memorial to the victims of violence". "An essential aspect of the reconciliation process is the promotion of a culture of tolerance at every level of society". </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">If we had a Bill of Rights, like we're supposed to, this Bill wouldn't hold up. Criminal convictions do play a part in some jobs, such as teaching, medicine, etc. And *mostly*, I can see why (though the fact that criminal convictions play a part in whether or not you can work in a certain sector opens up another argument to the validity of the convictions and the processes surrounding them- which is another important argument to have, not not one I'm trying to have here). </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">But the peace process (if you can call it that) wouldn't have happened if we didn't have political prisoners on side, if they were not sitting at the negotiating table and actively working to end their campaigns of armed resistance. It wouldn't have happened, period. There are many weaknesses to the Good Friday Agreement, but the fact that it actually happened remains a strength. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">To shut out those with criminal convictions from becoming special advisers is not fair. We elect them. We work alongside them. If we're going to open the special advisers can of worms, then why don't we focus on their huge salary? Why don't we focus on the fact it is more often than not 'jobs for the boys', rather than the appointment of an expert in the field? To me, that is more concerning. I'd have no problem with a special adviser having had a criminal conviction if they actually knew what they were talking about when they took up the post- many don't, and that's a huge problem that seems to be too often ignored. We seem intent to shut out those with criminal convictions but ignore the fact that so many of those employed (with and without criminal convictions) are in no way qualified for the job. That's the most important issue, to me.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">If we had an adequate programme of reconciliation, victims would feel as though their losses have been acknowledged. Recognised and apologised for. And we haven't done that yet. The reason that emotions are running so high amidst this Bill is because we have no process of reconciliation, we have not acknowledged the hurts of the past and it doesn't look like the current Executive in Stormont are getting any further in any kind of strategy. This is a huge problem. And again, the Bill has overtaken this issue as seemingly a more important one. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">It's a plaster covering a wound that needs properly dressed and a much bigger bandage than the one currently being offered. It'll help for a bit, but in the end, will prove futile in both the reconciliation process and any kind of attempt to foster a tolerant and just society.</span>Aisling Gallagherhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03368535232741519189noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5186809576962083474.post-52137891040016641332013-05-08T07:44:00.000-07:002013-05-08T07:44:15.245-07:00Conference-gate; what next? <span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">In March, I was thrown out of USI Congress by my union delegation (Queen's University Students' Union) for voting in a few that contradicted my students' union policy. I <a href="http://twoshadesofhope.blogspot.co.uk/2013/04/usi-congress-2013.html" target="_blank">wrote about it at the time</a>, and if you're reading this having not heard about what's happened, I'd advise you to read it only so we're on a similar page for the rest of the post.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">When we got back, there was some clarity needed on how I was going to be 'punished'. Again, I <a href="http://twoshadesofhope.blogspot.co.uk/2013/04/congress-gate.html" target="_blank">wrote about it at the time</a>, and again, I'd recommend you read that post before reading the rest of this.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Last night, the <a href="http://qubsu.org/president.asp" target="_blank">President of QUBSU</a> proposed two motions at the Annual Business Meeting of QUBSU Council (our last meeting of the academic year) to ban me from standing as a QUBSU delegate for national conferences. One would ban me for standing next year, and the second, for the following year (amusingly, I'll have left university by then, but no matter). </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">The vote was cast by secret ballot, with the President and I both given the chance to make two statements each. No one else was allowed to speak on the proposed motion.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">The QUBSU Council voted down the motion to ban me for the year 2014/2015 (29 votes against, 24 votes in favour) and voted in favour of the motion to ban me for the year 2013/2014 (31 votes in favour, 23 votes against). They've told me that I now cannot stand as a QUBSU national conference delegate for next year.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">They can't do this. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">In our union's constitution, it stipulates that <a href="http://qubsu.org/uploads/Core%20Constitution%20and%20Rules%20(Agreed%20by%20Senate%20on%2026%206%2012)(1).pdf" target="_blank">delegates to NUS Conference and USI Congress shall be elected by cross campus ballot</a> as in the Council elections (page 38). It also states that any student may offer themselves as a candidate in any Executive Management Committee Election provided that they complete a Nomination Form and return it in person to the Returning Officer before the close of nominations for the Executive Management Committee Election (page 35). The elections for conference delegations are held in a similar way to elections for Council and elections for the Executive Management Committee (ie, the sabbatical officers).</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>10. CONFERENCE DELEGATION ELECTIONS</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i><br /></i></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>National Union of Students (NUS) and Union of Students in Ireland (USI)</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i><br /></i></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>10.1 Delegates to NUS Conference and USI Congress shall be elected by cross campus </i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>ballot as in the Council Elections.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i><br /></i></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>10.2 One delegate to NUS Conference and two delegates to USI Congress may be </i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>appointed ex-officio.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i><br /></i></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>10.3 All Election materials shall be regulated as in the Council Elections (see Rule 2, </i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>Section 7).</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i><br /></i></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>10.4 Nomination Forms shall be of similar format to those used in Executive Management </i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>Committee Elections and must be accompanied with a deposit of £40, which will be </i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>refunded after attendance at Conference. (2007 is the base year for this amount </i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>which will increase annually by the rate of RPI).</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i><br /></i></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>10.5 The Returning Officer shall post on authorised noticeboards at least 14 days before </i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>the date on which the Delegation Election is to be held a notice declaring:-</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i><br /></i></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>10.5.1 the number of delegates to be elected;</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>10.5.2 the dates and times for closure of nominations;</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>10.5.3 the dates and times of polling.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i><br /></i></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>10.6 Nominations shall close on the eighth day before the date on which the relevant </i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>Election is to be held.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">The equality and diversity policy of the union (page 77) states that the SU seeks to provide equality to all, irrespective of political opinion, and that the policy applies to all members of the students' union. There is also a mention of a complaints procedure (but nothing saying what it actually is) for those who feel that they have suffered any form of discrimination through the use of the union's representation services (page 79). Rule 4, Appendix 1 of the constitution stipulates that elected student officers (ie. the President and the other sabbaticals) shall be bound by the University’s Student Conduct Regulations, the Equality and Diversity Statement and other Equality Policies of the University and Students’ Union (page 50). </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Secondly, there is no process in the constitution to punish someone for voting against live policy at national conferences. No process. No mention of it. And considering it takes a special meeting and a 2/3 majority of student councillors or EMC members to remove an elected officer from their position (page 54), the move taken last night was unfounded, without precedent, and unconstitutional.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 17px; white-space: pre-wrap;">To sum up, the constitution of QUBSU, and in particular:
</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 17px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span></span>
<br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 17px; white-space: pre-wrap;">1. The combination of Rule 2 10.8 (which says that delegate elections will be held in the same manner as elections for the Executive Management Committee(; Rule 2 10.4 (which says that nominations for delegate elections are like those for EMC); and Rule 2 9.6.1 (which says that anyone can run in an election for EMC);</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 17px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 17px; white-space: pre-wrap;">2. Chapter 1 8.2 (which says that the government of the union shall be based on the democratic principle that every ordinary member shall have the fullest opportunity to participate in union affairs);</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 17px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 17px; white-space: pre-wrap;">3. Rule 10 2.2.4 (which says that political belief is a protected characteristic under the Equality & Diversity Policy;</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 17px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 17px; white-space: pre-wrap;">4. Chapter 1 3.2, 3.9.2 & 3.9.4 (which states the aims of QUBSU as supporting equality of opportunity, freedom to participate in union elections, and the freedom of expression);</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 17px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 17px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><b>they had no grounds to do what they did, and I'll be happily handing in my nomination forms next year when nominations open for delegate elections to national conferences.</b></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><b style="font-weight: normal;"></b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><b style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span></b></span></div>
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</ol>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><b style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span></b></span></div>
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Aisling Gallagherhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03368535232741519189noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5186809576962083474.post-21830919516847032782013-04-27T05:38:00.000-07:002013-04-27T05:38:08.424-07:00Congress-gate..<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">About a month ago, I was thrown out of USI Congress. I've written about the specific details over what happened (which are quite important to read beforehand so you have an idea of what's going on!) on another blog post <a href="http://twoshadesofhope.blogspot.co.uk/2013/04/usi-congress-2013.html" target="_blank">here</a>. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Anyway, since I've been home, a number of things have happened. Firstly, the EMC of QUBSU (made up of sabbatical officers and union management) asked me to go to a meeting to decide what would happen to me, essentially. They'd been telling the press and anyone who asked that QUBSU Council would 'decide my punishment', but then tried to change their minds. Below are the emails that were sent:</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>"CONFIDENTIAL</i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i> </i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>Dear Aisling,</i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i> </i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>A Special Meeting of the Executive Management Committee is to be convened to consider the recent events at the Union of Students in Ireland (USI) Congress.</i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i> </i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>I have been asked to ascertain whether or not you would be available to attend such a meeting at some point between 11.00 a.m. and 2.00 p.m. on Friday 26 April 2013.</i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i> </i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>If the above scheduling is unsuitable, can you please indicate those dates and times when you would be available during the week beginning Monday 29 April 2013?</i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span lang="en-US"><b><i> </i></b></span></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>Regards..."</i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i><br /></i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<div>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>Hi,</i></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i><br /></i></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>I'm a little confused. Why am I being asked to go to a meeting with only the executive rather than in front of council?</i></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i><br /></i></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>Thanks</i></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i><br /></i></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>Aisling </i></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i><br /></i></span></div>
<div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>"Hi Aisling,</i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i> </i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>The Executive Management Committee will consider the matter initially.</i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i> </i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>If that Committee takes a decision that you wish to appeal, the Council will consider your appeal and make a final determination.</i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i> </i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>Best wishes..."</i></span></div>
</div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i><br /></i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I then said that going a meeting where the people who decided to throw me out would decide my punishment was beyond ridiculous and undemocratic.</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i><br /></i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>"Hi Aisling,</i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i> </i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>If you are invited to attend a Special Meeting of EMC to consider this matter and you choose not to attend, this is your right but the meeting is likely to proceed in your absence.</i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i> </i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>If you are unhappy with any decision that is taken at this Special Meeting, you may appeal to the Council.</i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i> </i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>I would strongly recommend that you take advantage of all of the possible opportunities to put your side of things but, ultimately, this will be a matter for yourself to decide.</i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i> </i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>Best wishes..."</i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i><br /></i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>"Hi Dominic,</i></span><div>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i><br /></i></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>I've gone away and thought about some stuff and I'd like to know in advance before the meeting:</i></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i><br /></i></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>- A copy of <span style="background-color: white;">the written procedures governing this and how a session like this should be run</span></i></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>- Whether they're planning to run the <span style="background-color: white;">session with the sabbs who took the original decision participating (other than as witnesses), seeing as they're the ones who took the decision in the first place</span></i></span></div>
<div>
<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>- A specific wording of charges I'm specifically being asked to answer or offence I'm being asked to respond to </i></span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>- Who will be participating on EMC</i></span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i><span style="background-color: white;">- </span><span style="background-color: white;">If something were to be brought to a disciplinary committee or appeal within the university, then a book of evidence, containing details of all relevant evidence and procedures, has to be provided to the student and all members of the panel - everyone should get the same material, so I think it is reasonable to request this.</span></i></span></div>
<div>
<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i><br /></i></span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>Cheers,</i></span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i><br /></i></span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>Aisling"</i></span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">He then said he'd forward on my comments to the union president (sent on 18th April).</span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">On 26th April, I received this:</span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>"Dear Aisling,</i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i> </i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>I have been asked to inform you that, after due deliberations, the Executive Management Committee has decided to refer this matter directly to Council to be discussed at the Annual Business Meeting on Tuesday 7 May 2013. </i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i> </i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>The Council will be asked to consider the following propositions:</i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i> </i></span></div>
<div align="justify" style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i><span style="background-color: white;">On Monday 25 March 2013, at the Annual Congress of the Union of Students’ In Ireland, Aisling Gallagher, acting solely in her capacity as a delegate of Queen’s University Belfast Students’ Union, cast a vote that opposed live Queen’s Students’ Union policy when voting on a motion entitled “</span>Engaging with the Abortion Rights Campaign”.</i></span></div>
<div align="justify" style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i> </i></span></div>
<div align="justify" style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i><span style="background-color: white;">On Tuesday 26 March 2013, at the Annual Congress of the Union of Students’ In Ireland, Aisling Gallagher, acting solely in her capacity as a delegate of Queen’s University Belfast Students’ Union, cast a vote that opposed live Queen’s Students’ Union policy when voting on a motion entitled “</span>Crisis Pregnancy Agencies”.</i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i> </i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>At Council the Union President will outline the case against you. You will then have the opportunity to state your case. Following this there will be another opportunity for both you and the Union President to speak on this matter. Subsequent to this Council will be given two motions to vote on, detailing potential sanctions for your actions. The two options will be as follows:</i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i> </i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>1. To bar you from attending any conference organised by a national union as a QUB SU delegate for the 2013/14 Academic Year.</i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i> </i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>2. To bar you from attending any conference organised by a national union as a QUB SU delegate for the 2014/15 Academic Year.</i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i> </i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>We feel that it would be inappropriate for Council to take a decision in relation to your deposit for attending USI Congress. You can therefore collect this from the general office on the 2<sup>nd</sup> floor of the SU at your convenience.</i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i> </i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>If you seek any further guidance please get in touch.</i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i> </i></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>Regards..."</i></span></div>
</div>
<div>
<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">So, essentially, QUBSU Council gets to vote on whether or not I'm to be banned from going to any more conferences (amusingly, next year will be the last year of my degree- but it appears they think I'm planning to stay on once I'm done). </span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Thing is, can they <i>actually</i> do this? There's nothing in the constitution about this (or about any of the mandate stuff that caused the problem, either), and I don't exactly see how they can stop students standing in elections to be delegates. I mean, regardless of whether the motions pass or fail, I don't see how they can just DO this.. and it seems a lot of other QUBSU students don't understand it either.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">The meeting will take place in the Space in QUBSU at 6pm on Tuesday 7th May (as far as I'm aware), so any support in the form of people coming to the meeting would be great (and there's free pizza, too). </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">The thing that gets me is that they're bringing up rules that are literally pulled from thin air. Plus, I already spent three days of a conference in a hotel room following the twitter feed when I should've been on Congress floor representing the students who sent me there- isn't that punishment enough? </span></span></div>
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Aisling Gallagherhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03368535232741519189noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5186809576962083474.post-39273390183478998302013-04-18T14:20:00.002-07:002013-04-18T14:20:54.399-07:00A lot of Thoughts.<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">This will not be an easy post to write. I have some music playing in the background, and a glass of wine beside me. I can already feel my eyes tearing up. Mostly because I've never told anyone this before, and I never thought much about it until recently.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I didn't think about it again until recently because I never thought it was odd. Or rather, I didn't see any significance in it, if that makes sense. I'm finding it difficult to get words out, they are in a mixed up mess with a lot of feelings and thoughts and I'm not quite sure how to talk about this, or where to start.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">When I was about 7, I wanted to be a boy. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">It feels very strange to have those words staring up at me. I have thought and thought and thought about them in the past few weeks, but I haven't said them. I wanted to be a boy. My friends were boys, I played with boys at break time, I liked the girls I was friends with, but I identified with the boys more. And so I told my friends I was deciding to be a boy. And told them to call me Ash instead of Aisling. And thought this wasn't unreasonable at all.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">And of course, in a typical seven-year-old way, nobody else thought this was the most normal thing in the world (I've never directly talked to my parents about this sort of stuff, but I know that they have been instrumental in me becoming who I am. Although this sort of thing I find difficult to talk about with anyone, I know that they love me entirely and have been so wonderful at making my sisters and I the open minded people we are today. My mum always tells a story - TANGENT, SOZ - about how when I was about four, I was in my Granda's car when he was bringing us somewhere or other, and he asked why I only had two of my girl Barbies with me rather than bringing one of the boy ones, and I told him not to be silly, Granda, they're lesbians. And he had no idea how I knew what lesbians were. I have no idea how I knew either, but that's not the point. The point is that this sort of stuff was never odd to me, at all. And I have my parents to thank for that). The girls told me I couldn't play with them any more and that I wasn't allowed in the girls' toilets either. The boys' toilets terrified me. I'm not quite sure why. It was maybe the fear of not knowing what they were like behind the door. I don't really know.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">And then I dropped it. I didn't want to be left out, I was seven years old. I dropped it and I remember feeling annoyed that people had laughed and didn't think that it was perfectly reasonable, but I got over it. But it was one of those memories that you remember, clearly. I have a picture in my head, I can remember how I felt. I didn't think about it too much. Except the times, as I grew up, when I'd be told my hair was a mess when I was playing rounders, and I told them I didn't care. When I felt pressured to shave my legs at the age of twelve, as if there was something wrong with the hair that was on them. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">What would have happened if, when I was seven years old, it had been fine? It had been fine to suddenly announce to your classmates that you wanted to be a boy, and that they just better get used to it. We didn't even get to wear trousers in primary school, never mind secondary school. I wore a <i>pinafore</i> in secondary school. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">This is upsetting, but the kind of upsetting that needed to come out, at some time or other. What I would give to tell the seven-year-old me that there was nothing wrong with wanting to be a boy, to tell the twelve-year-old me that taking out my self-hatred on myself wouldn't make the problems go away, to tell fifteen-year-old me that I didn't <i>need</i> to wear make up if I didn't want to, to tell seventeen-year-old me to stop thinking about how seemingly huge I looked in my formal dress and to just try and enjoy your night. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I don't know how to tell myself now that the problems constantly circling around my head are, often, the result of the society I live in. It is not acceptable to be different. Especially in Northern Ireland, but it obviously isn't a problem only here. It is lonely and isolating to live in a place where your Health Minister thinks that <a href="http://www.belfasttelegraph.co.uk/news/health/gay-blood-ban-health-minister-edwin-poots-and-attorney-general-john-larkin-in-spotlight-as-minister-is-ordered-to-reveal-secret-advice-29188981.html" target="_blank">blood from a gay man is dirty</a>, where you rarely say the words "I AM QUEER" because you know that most people will either laugh or look confused. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">This is upsetting to write and upsetting to think about, because I usually don't let myself do so. The anger at the injustice usually wins out- which is great, because it shows, for the most part, my mental health isn't being too badly affected (in the past it has been very badly affected by this kind of stuff). The anger at the sheer ridiculousness of the lack of equality always wins out. I don't let myself think about how upsetting it is when someone thinks that you don't deserve something that they take for granted everyday. When something is core to your being, to have it dismissed, again and again, is very difficult to deal with. Of course, you all know this. You're maybe nodding your head- even if we're talking about different things in terms of the specifics, we all understand what I'm talking about. Whether it's equal marriage or the right to choose or the right to hold your partner's hand on the street without getting abuse hurled at you, it's all the same. We fight because it is how we deal with these things, and we don't let ourselves feel the hurt. We don't because we can't let them win. We can't give up, because they will have won. We can't give up because we will be on the right side of history and they will not. We can't give up because it is the fucking right thing to do.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">This has gone off into a bit of a tangent. But I don't care. I used to write a lot when I was young. Stories, poems, songs, I did it all. I was that kid in school who went over the word limit by seven pages with a massive story that I just had to get out because it would be too unreasonable to stick to the three page word limit. I used to use words to just get it all out and I've only started to do it again, publicly, in the last while. I wrote my post about identifying as Queer on this blog. I suppose one thing it definitely shows is how much my generation are babies of the technological age, but you know what I mean. I don't feel the need to 'announce' it to anyone, but I feel the need to recognise it. This is who I am and this is how I feel and <i>that is okay</i>, even if it wasn't okay for so many years. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I'm in tears, and I don't know if they're happy tears or sad tears, or need-to-define-them-at-all tears, but they're there and that's okay. I wish I could be at LGBT Conference right now. I am so happy that my union finally sent someone (and I know he will have an incredible time! I've been tagging him in a million tweets all week introducing him to people I want him to meet). At Women's Conference, once I got over the anxiety and stuff that I'd been feeling, I don't think I'd ever felt more accepted in a group of people before. You didn't have to explain, you didn't have to validate why you were there or how you felt or <i>anything</i>, and it was great. It was so, so great. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">The fact that I can acknowledge this, whatever <i>this</i> is, is both overwhelming and wonderful. The reason I can is because of a few people.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I first met Hel on NUS Women's Committee this year. And Hel is a fucking genius. Literally, a fountain of wisdom. But not only that, Hel is the nicest person in the entire world. I don't think I've ever met someone with more patience, ever. Always willing and ready to answer any questions, write you up a blog post, facilitate a workshop- anyone who knows Hel knows what I'm talking about. It is the combination of Hel's <a href="http://helgurney.wordpress.com/" target="_blank">way with words</a> (link to the blog), immense and unending kindness and willingness to approach every single little thing with the best of attitudes and the most positive of outlooks. I can't express, really, how much knowing Hel has made me feel able to talk about these kinds of things. At all. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">When I first got involved in NUS-USI (which, realistically, has been pretty life changing) Adrianne was there to pick up the pieces and show me what to do. Show me how to get through, show me what to avoid, educate me, lead me, tell me just how much of a fucking right I had to be there with the men. Adrianne was the catalyst to me being able to come to terms with and discover a hell of a lot of things about myself and I will never forget that. Ever. THIS HAS TURNED INTO A BLOG ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE PEOPLE. I think I've just accepted that it is a medley of thoughts..</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">And Sky. Sky, Sky, Sky. I don't really have the words, but anyone who knows Sky knows what I'm talking about without me even having to say it. In so many ways, Sky has done so much without even realising it. And a lot consciously, too. To have someone who is so unequivocally <i>themselves</i> is the best thing I can see, as someone who is really confused and not sure what the hell is going on, ever. I'm almost sure I'm not the only one who thinks this, but to have Sky as one of the leaders of our LGBT campaign in terms of NUS, is one of the best things I have been privileged to witness this year and I literally don't want to think about when Sky leaves. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">It obviously hasn't been just these people, the support and love from people like Kelley and Maryam will never go unnoticed. They have all been mentors and comforters and supporters and leaders and fucking <i>good friends</i>, people like this inspire me every single day and it is one of the reasons I am so thankful for getting involved the way I have this year. Without it, I wouldn't be helping people. Without it, I would probably be as screwed up as I was a few years ago. I am determined to make 2013 a year with no hospital stays, with no dips that last for months, <i>I will not let myself stop trying to accept myself</i>, even when it is hard. These people are the reason that I can remember to keep going on. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">This has been a post composed of a lot of things. But I am ending on a happy note. These people have helped me realise and accept things about myself that I never could have dreamed I could accept, things I didn't know <i>existed</i> until an embarrassingly short time ago. And for that, I am eternally grateful. This is why we do what we do. For people like this. </span>Aisling Gallagherhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03368535232741519189noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5186809576962083474.post-8648464786494509662013-04-12T04:29:00.000-07:002013-04-12T13:02:28.403-07:00NUS Conference 2013<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Trigger warning for frank discussion of rape apologists and mental health.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">This year was my first NUS Conference. I was a QUBSU delegate, along with five other people- four students and two sabbatical officers. NUS wasn't what I thought it would be. At all. In some ways in was better and it some ways worse. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I'll begin by talking about one of the things I was most proud of. A mass walkout occurred twice, when a known rape apologist and SWP member took to the stage (first for an election speech for one of the FTO positions, and then for Block). Obviously some people could not walk out due to access issues/the fact they were candidates, but I was immensely proud of the fact that we did this. It was cross-party, cross-faction, cross-political persuasion, but I am very proud that one thing we <i>could</i> agree on. NUS made it pretty clear- we don't have time, nor do we have respect, for those who are rape apologists. They have no place in our organisation, and rightly so. I am proud of us. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Another thing I was immensely proud of was the <a href="https://www.facebook.com/events/357092177735314/?fref=ts" target="_blank">vigil</a> that was held for Steven Simpson. Organised at the last minute by Rosie Huzzard, Sky Yarlett and Finn McGoldrick (the NUS LGBT Officers) spoke at the vigil, as did two members of the Disabled Students' Committee. There was a lot of anger, and there were a lot of tears. It was incredibly moving, incredibly emotional and I'm very proud that it was held. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Now, unfortunately, to talk about the things that disappointed me during conference.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">First off, accessibility. My first NUS conference was NUS Women's Conference 2013, and at it, though I found some problems with accessibility, a few members of Women's Committee worked really hard to draft and propose a motion on improving accessibility, and I definitely think that next year Women's Conference will be even more accessible. But NUS Conference was not, in any sense of the word. There were access breaks, thankfully, but the days were very long. I missed debates on motions that I really wanted to be at, simply because I just couldn't do it. The unavailability of water, the fact that there were no reserved seats at the end of rows to facilitate those who feel they will probably have to run in and out for whatever reason, the endless, <i>endless</i> whooping and cheering, even though this was rightly called out by chairs numerous times, was so disappointing. It was also very disappointing to see the leadership actively do this numerous times. I understand people make mistakes, but at Women's Conference, it was noticeable that any time someone whooped, they usually ended up covering their mouth and you could see them telling themselves to try not to do it- at least people were trying. I'm not entirely innocent on this either, and I'm annoyed at myself. A conscious effort by <i>all</i> is definitely needed if we are to improve on this- and not improving on this would be a disgrace. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Secondly, the conscious and visible control that the leadership tried to have over the conference as a whole was not a secret. There were numerous attempts to stifle debate, and specific members of the leadership got up to publicly insult individuals, which I feel is an abuse of the platform. I'm not saying that I necessarily agree or disagree with the specific views that were expressed, just that I think it was an abuse of the platform and was extremely disappointing as a first time delegate to see, especially because it was people who I have had a lot of respect for doing so. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">The control shown by the leadership translated into policy debates that resulted in policy being voted/agreed on that I was surprised by. I thought NUS Conference would be considerably more left wing. I would say that for the most part (at least, this is what I thought), within NUS it is an argument between the centre, the left, and the further left, but when a Tory is cheered and whooped at, repeatedly, it begs the question as to what our common aims are. We might not as a conference agree on free education (which frankly makes me shudder), we might not agree on gender balancing, we may not agree on a lot of things, but I thought the one thing we <i>did</i> agree on is that the current coalition is systemically destroying the UK as we know it. But we cheered and clapped for a candidate getting up and insulting other members, and seemed to forget that he is a member of the party who is taking down everything we stand for. Just an observation- though I feel it is an important one.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Another thing is that I didn't necessarily agree with everything 'the left' did, either. I don't think it was conducive to anyone to stand up and call all of NUS 'scabs'. That said, as a whole I think this person made a great speech and I was very proud of her- but I wouldn't be being honest, which is what I'm trying to do here, if I pretended I was comfortable with that word being used. Similarly, I thought the Carbon Rod stuff was funny- but there were a few things in the speech that made me feel uncomfortable, specifically the bit about access. I agree with much of the speech about the demo and its failings, but I don't agree that the leadership pointing out how horrendous the access stuff was when the scuffle happened in the park after the main demo was point scoring, or anything but genuine anger and concern. But of course- some will disagree with me on that. [NOTE: <i>I've talked to people since writing this post, and I realise it was a misunderstanding. They weren't getting at what I thought they were getting at in terms of the access stuff- which is good, because I was shocked at the time, and it makes a little more sense now. I mean, they might not like the leadership and they may criticise NUS but they're also not assholes, which is why I was surprised in the first place.</i>]</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I've always thought that within NUS we respected difference, to an extent. The people I have worked with (generally) respect when we differ on things- whether it be policy or campaigns or whatever. We disagree and we put it behind us- in terms of those who are my friends, our friendship is not changed, and in terms of those who are primarily my colleagues, our professional relationship is not changed. But this wasn't the case at this years conference. Insults were thrown about, publicly, on the <i>platform</i>, and that was horrendous to see. I do understand that people will not respect those who do not respect them- I used to be like that. Now, for the most part, I feel sorry for those people (as in, those who do not feel that I am owed respect). I am angry initially, of course, but thankfully I have learnt to let go of the anger because I know that the only person it's hurting is myself. I think that learning to do this is vital if you're going to survive in the NUS/student politics environment, simply because if you didn't, you would have a breakdown- keeping hold of that much anger is too much for any person to do. I feel sorry for people who do not respect things that are fundamental to my existence in that they cannot extend the courtesy to others that others extend to them, I feel sorry that they are so caught up in their own lives that they feel their homophobic, transphobic, racist, sexist (or whatever the disagreement may be on) views are <i>fine</i>, even though they compromise and insult the very core of the people they are disagreeing with. I have learnt to let go of the anger, for the most part, I hold towards people like this because if I didn't, I couldn't survive. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Thankfully, I'll end on a positive note. I met a lot of incredible people at this conference, people I would not have met otherwise. Sometimes we met because we were both furious at something that had just been said or passed, sometimes we met because we just happened to be in the same place at the same time. But there were <i>so</i> many people in that room who are fucking incredible, so many people who work incredibly hard in their students' unions and who I would give anything to have working within my own students' union. Vonnie's speech about remembering most of our members are FE and that any attempt for our leadership to push through policy without debate being unacceptable, Stacey and Naomi's speeches about our utter commitment to giving rape apologists the back door, Thais constantly reminding us about accessibility and how important it was, Rosie's speech about remembering our trade union links, Vicki's leaving speech- her unapologetic honesty, her passion and her drive, constantly reminding us that underneath each set of political views is a person, and that no person deserves to be treated the way many people within the leadership were treated this year. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I wouldn't have gotten through the past few days if it weren't for people like Sky and Rosie and Rebecca. They were extremely tough, both in terms of my drive to keep fighting and my own mental and physical health. I want to come back, though. I want to keep working and keep fighting and keep debating and disagreeing and I want other people to want to do the same. But I don't want to see the lack of basic respect again. I'm a member of political parties and anti-cuts groups, but the most important thing in writing this, for me, is my honesty- I am proud of and disappointed in different 'sides' in equal measure, and whilst people may disagree (and they have the right to do so, and I respect that), the least we can do is respect the fact that we have differing opinions. We're not going to get anything done if we don't accept the fact we disagree on some things, and work positively to try and change the minds of others. We bloody love democracy, we do- but I also bloody love respect and common courtesy, of which this conference was lacking entirely. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I am hoping that next year will be better, I am. At the end of the day, I am hopelessly optimistic, and probably have a little too much faith in people. But it is who I am, and I'm unapologetic for that. We need an NUS Conference that is accessible, welcoming, inclusive, and respectful. The vigil on Tuesday night definitely put everything into perspective- and I think many would agree with me on that. At the end of the day, we are all human. And I hope we can respect that. You don't convince anyone you're right when you're spending your time yelling down other people, and you don't make yourself or your opinions look great when you spend most of your time throwing insults. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I am a first time delegate, and this was my experience. By all means, leave comments- but if you disagree, please be respectful. The last thing we need is for the poisonous atmosphere within conference to extend any further.</span>Aisling Gallagherhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03368535232741519189noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5186809576962083474.post-16941441479469600722013-04-02T06:47:00.000-07:002013-04-02T06:54:35.013-07:00USI Congress 2013.<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Last week I went to Ballinasloe for USI Congress 2013 as part of the QUBSU delegation. We were all student councillors, elected at the start of the year. We weren't elected separately as delegates for the Congress (there is never as much interest within QUBSU about attending USI in comparison to attending NUS-USI), but rather expressed our interest and as councillors were all allowed to attend. This is the first important thing to remember. <i>We weren't elected</i>. Our mandate came from our election as councillors, months ago, in October.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">We were warned that we weren't allowed to 'break mandate' at USI- that is, vote on anything/in favour of anything that contradicted live union policy. This wasn't a decision taken by our student council, it wasn't a decision taken by the wider student body. It was taken by the EMC (composed of the seven sabbatical officers and a few of the staff in the union). It was in direct response to USI Congress 2012- a few delegates 'broke mandate' and voted on things that contradicted union policy. They didn't want this to happen again, so they introduced this rule. This rule isn't in our constitution, it isn't in the USI constitution. It was literally decided behind closed doors, without consulting the student council (who would probably have supported it, but that isn't the point). This is the second important thing to remember.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">On the first day of Congress, I hadn't planned to speak- I never tend to plan these sorts of things. But a motion came up in the lapsing policy section of Congress, about continuing USI's pro-choice work. This was the motion:</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-style: italic;">09/WEL 2</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">ABORTION RIGHTS CAMPAIGN</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Congress notes</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">That USI is mandated to lobby the government and other relevant bodies to develop greater access to abortion services for all women within the state (06/WEL 6 Abortion). </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Congress further notes </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">That USI’s involvement in this debate in the past (SPUC vs. Grogan) led to the changing of legislation so that information about abortion could be distributed freely in the state. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Congress recognises </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">That in many student unions abroad and indeed in many organisations worldwide the issue of abortion is viewed as an issue of equality and women’s rights .</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Congress further recognises </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">That the issue is one of concern for Welfare Officers around the country. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Congress is disappointed </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">By the silence of USI on this issue for the past number of years. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Congress acknowledges</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">The establishment of the Safe and Legal (in Ireland) Abortion Rights Campaign which aims to end the hypocrisy of exiling women in crisis pregnancy that choose to have an abortion. The campaign includes various strands, including a litigation strand, a public awareness strand and a national and international advocacy strand.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Congress mandates</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">The Welfare and Equality Officer to work with the Safe and Legal (in Ireland) Abortion Rights Campaign to once again make this issue a priority for Irish Women.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Congress further mandates </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">The Welfare and Equality Officer to raise awareness of the Safe and Legal (in Ireland) Abortion Rights Campaign to USI members and to support the campaign in any of its actions.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="font-style: italic;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">(See <a href="http://usi.ie/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/usiCLAR-2013-a7-PRINT.pdf">http://usi.ie/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/usiCLAR-2013-a7-PRINT.pdf</a> for a copy of the 2013 Congress documentation)</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I spoke in favour of continuing to work on the issue- I believe it is one of paramount importance. I then voted in favour- it easily passed (though the 'Congress is disappointed' point was removed, as it is to the credit of USI that they have been at the forefront of campaigning for choice in Ireland over the last while). I was told our union President would be having a word with me later on- I'd 'broken mandate'.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Later on, I met the President (who brought the VP Campaigns with him). I was told that the EMC did not want to stop me participating, they did not want to stop me representing students, but if I broke mandate again by voting in favour of something that contradicted QUBSU live policy, I would no longer be a QUBSU delegate at USI Congress 2013. I was surprised, even though we'd be warned about the prospect of this happening. This is the QUBSU stance:</span><br />
<i style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br /></i>
<i style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">745.6 This Council repeals policy 3.1 on the Policy File.</i><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>This Council recognises that the issue of abortion is a highly divisive issue </i><i>and a matter for each individual’s conscience. Being desirous of a unified, </i><i>inclusive Students’ Union this Council mandates to Students’ Union to adopt a </i><i>position of neutrality in regards to abortion. </i><i>This Council encourages students with an interest in issues surrounding </i><i>abortion to express this through the available student societies and external </i><i>organisations. This Council mandates the Students’ Union to provide a </i><i>neutral venue for discussions and debates regarding abortion and to assist </i><i>societies with an interest in the matter in a fair and equitable manner.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>Proposer – Caoimhe McNeill</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>Seconder – Jessica Kirk </i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i><br /></i></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">(As an aside, I find it slightly ironic that they were threatening to throw me out for something that they claim is "a matter of each individual's conscience"...)</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">On the second day, I voted in favour of this motion:</span><br />
<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-style: italic;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-style: italic;">09/WEL 11</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">CRISIS PREGNANCY AGENCIES</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Congress notes </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">That there is no legislation controlling crisis pregnancy agencies in Ireland. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Congress notes with concern </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">That as a result a number of rogue crisis pregnancy agencies have started up.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Congress recognizes </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">That a rogue crisis pregnancy agency is one where the sole purpose of the agency is to prevent a pregnant woman from having <i></i></span></div>
<div style="display: inline !important;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>an abortion. They misinform and intimidate women to achieve their aim, using methods such as harassment, bullying and been </i></span><i style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">given blatantly false information. [Irish Family Planning Association (IFPA)]</i></div>
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</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Congress acknowledges </span></div>
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</span>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">The work done this year by Choice Ireland in campaigning against rogue crisis pregnancy agencies.</span><br />
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Congress mandates the Welfare Officer. <i></i></div>
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<i><i></i></i></div>
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<i><i>To work with Choice Ireland, and other relevant agencies, to protest against these rogue crisis pregnancy agencies.</i></i><br />
<i><i><br /></i></i></div>
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Congress further mandates the Welfare Officer</div>
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To lobby for the introduction of legislation in this area.</div>
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<br /></div>
I do not believe that this was voting in opposition to a neutral position on abortion, I believe that this was voting in favour of telling the truth to pregnant women- something that, I would hope, people would agree on no matter what their opinion of abortion. Because the motion stipulated to "work with Choice Ireland", our President claimed it was not neutral and that we should abstain. I was told to leave the room once I'd voted in favour, I had my delegate card taken off me and was told I was no longer a QUBSU delegate at USI Congress 2013.<br />
<br />
Once our President had told USI that I was no longer part of the QUBSU delegation, there was nothing USI could do- and I understand that, every union is autonomous within USI. He also would not make me an observer (we had a good few delegate/observer places left over- we never fill them). If I was an observer I would not have been able to vote- but I would have been able to enter the room, to listen. Instead, I spent three days in a hotel room, following the #USI13 feed on Twitter. If it hadn't been so far away, or the issue hadn't been so contentious, perhaps they would've tried to send me home- that's the usual protocol when someone is thrown out of a union delegation.<br />
<br />
So what now? The support I received from other delegates was incredible, likewise, the support I received from people at home. I did not feel so alone- I knew I had done the right thing. There were two women delegates in our delegation out of eight. Many people find it absolutely ridiculous that the male dominated EMC decided to throw one out for speaking for her right to choose. That said, the week was isolating, lonely, and incredibly difficult. A few of my delegation did go out of their way to check I was alright, invite me over in the evenings, that sort of stuff- and I am very grateful for the support, particularly because it came from people who I have not exactly gotten along with in the past. I really did appreciate the effort that they made. Others ignored me for the remainder of the trip.<br />
<br />
There are a number of issues here- firstly, regarding mandate. Were we there on the union's mandate? Or on our individual mandate? I believe the latter, the President believes the former. That is essentially the argument, and one that will be settled at our next meeting of QUBSU student council (if you want to come along, do- it's going to be interesting, to say the least).<br />
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However, there are a few other factors to consider- the conflict isn't simply on mandate. Neutrality on the issue of abortion (whilst I believe is a complete cop out, ignoring our duties as student representatives and students' union and putting our heads under the sand on the reality of the situation in Ireland), isn't as simple as just abstaining on every motion regarding abortion. The motion itself stipulates that the council now believes it is a matter of <i>individual conscience</i> and acknowledges the right for individual students to <i>work with external organisations. </i>Take from that what you will.. but I believe it gives individuals the right to express their opinions and vote accordingly at national conferences.<br />
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Another issue is that of 'mandates' as a whole. Students' unions sabbatical officers dislike when you criticise them, but hate when you criticise the validity of the structures that enabled them to get to where they are even more. Every time I tried to talk about the mandate issue, I was told by our President that the EMC was elected with a huge mandate, bigger than the council mandate- I agree the turn out was bigger than for the council elections. <a href="http://thegown.net/2013/03/07/qubsu-election-results-2013/" target="_blank">4,124</a> students voted in the 2012 sabbatical elections. <i>4,124. </i>There are <a href="http://www.ucas.com/students/choosingcourses/choosinguni/instguide/q/q75" target="_blank">24,197</a> students at Queen's. That's a turn out of around 17% (I think- if I'm wrong, correct me! Working out percentages is not my strong point..). <i>17%... </i>Anyone who thinks that this gives anyone the right to do <i>anything</i> in the name of 'all students', in the name of a 'huge mandate', needs a strong reality check.<br />
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There are a number of articles going round the internet about what happened at Congress- and there are some factual errors in them, unsurprisingly (that's not to say I don't appreciate the media coverage- I do!). Take this blog post as my account of what happened, even if it contradicts some of the things mentioned in the various articles.<br />
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Lastly, some asked me why I voted the way I did, when the motions would have passed with a comfortable majority regardless of my vote.<br />
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I voted because I am a woman, because I am a rational human being who believes in compassion for others. I voted because the laws governing my body in Northern Ireland date back to 1861. I voted because women in Ireland are told to be ashamed of making a decision regarding their reproductive health, because Savita Halappanavar's dying foetus was <a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2013/apr/02/medics-treating-savita-halappanavar" target="_blank">given more attention</a> than she was. I voted because I know women who have had abortions, because each one of us know women who have had abortions. I voted because my reproductive health is not the business of anyone else. I voted because QUBSU women students need to know that even though their union has abandoned them, there is still support from within the student population. I voted because I am a feminist, because I believe in equality. I voted because the other QUBSU delegates decided to remain silent. <b>I voted because it was the right thing to do. </b><br />
<br />
</span>Aisling Gallagherhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03368535232741519189noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5186809576962083474.post-10511892405100590382013-04-02T02:21:00.000-07:002013-04-02T02:21:06.122-07:00HOME.<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I am home, finally. I've spent the last few days in Wales visiting my sister with my family, and the few days before that at USI Congress. I'm exhausted. I feel like I could sleep for a year. This was evident while we were in Wales- I stayed in, went to bed earlier than everyone else, slept later than everyone else. I am drained and I have three more conferences to do and four essays and not much time.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I've been living out of a suitcase recently. It feels odd that it was only a week ago I was travelling to Ballinasloe for USI; it feels like it was weeks ago. I'll write about that, once I regain some energy and reply to work emails and sort out washing, and all sorts of boring, menial things that you can't do while you're travelling. Most people reading this probably know what happened. Safe to say it was a horrible week. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Maybe this is a little bit of a glimpse into what the next few years might be like, if I choose to run for election within NUS-USI or NUS. Living out of a suitcase and never being home and constantly trying not to fall asleep on trains. But I won't even get there if I don't put my head down and actually get some of my university work done- this term got off to a bad start but has improved significantly, so I need it to stay that way. I need to get this year done. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">So I'll write later, when I have the time. It's safe to say I need to rid my head of some thoughts.</span>Aisling Gallagherhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03368535232741519189noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5186809576962083474.post-39968659834723671842013-03-19T09:15:00.001-07:002013-03-19T09:15:33.863-07:00One thing I will not do is shut up.In the last few days a number of people I know have deleted me from Facebook, or blocked me. In the grand scheme of things, they don't matter. They're not my friends. They're not even my acquaintances. So why am I writing this?<br />
<br />
It's because I post a lot about things that are affecting women and students, because I post a lot about how I wish my students' union focused on the housing crisis rather than a stupid fucking talent show, because I post about things that we are all happy to live in blissful ignorance of. <br />
<br />
GUESS WHAT? One in seven women will be victim of a serious sexual or physical assault whilst they're in university. I am not going to shut up. One thing I will never do is shut up. Maybe you haven't ever been a victim of sexual harassment, maybe you don't think institutional racism exists- but it happens. It happens and affects so many students and I am not prepared to sit back and ignore what is happening around me. <br />
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I am not against constructive criticism at all- I think national officers should be held to account. But this isn't like the infighting within the left- this is people who fundamentally disagree that these things are a problem, and for the life of me I am never going to sit down and be quiet just because you don't like what I'm hearing. Aisling Gallagherhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03368535232741519189noreply@blogger.com2